History Funny / HannahRutherford

** After reading a note which mentions that Waylon has "widened" his horizons, Kim exclaims that, as they've just come across a man's body ''with a vagina ripped into it'', that "widened is ''not the word we want to use here''!"

*** The fact that this late becomes their donation theme for Fright Night is hilarious.

---> '''Hannah/Kim:''' ''[with a mixture of excitement and trepidation]'' Showers!

---> '''Hannah:''': It won't be alright.
---> '''Kim:''': I think you're alright -
---> '''Hannah:''': ''[interrupting]'' It won't be alright.

-->'''Door:''' ''*slides open, startling Hannah*''

-->'''Shan Yun:''' ''*sings aria*''

-->'''Hannah:''' ''*to Shan Yun*'' [[BigShutUp Shut]] [[BoomHeadshot up!]]

-->'''Hannah:''' ''*while ducking and dodging by the skin of her teeth*'' '''''[[DeadpanSnarker Y'think?!]]'''''

-->'''Hannah:''' ''*wordlessly gives the camera an absolutely deadpan "Are you fucking serious/kidding me?!" look*''

-->'''Hannah:''' Well, good luck with ''that'' in America, mate. ''*rips open the aforementioned Snickers bar*''

-->'''Hannah:''' ''*Gets the exact same look on her face as earlier, but with her mouth full of chocolate*''

-->'''Hannah:''' ''*audibly nauseated and squicked*'' I'd rather '''''die'''''!

-->'''Hannah:''' ''*in a very panicked tone of voice*'' [[DeterioratesIntoGibberish Ho! Ha! Hoi dee bah! Ho!]] Ow! Pokey poke! Poke! ''*she makes it through to Atreus*'' Hello! Hi! Ho! That was horrible! We're ''never'' doing that again.

-->'''Hannah''' ''(playing as Evie, she's climbed to the top of a crane; as words appear on the screen)'': "Tutorial! Be an Assassin..." ''(cue Hannah skipping it immediately and, in a rather annoyed sotto voice, muttering)'': Don't tell me how to be an Assassin. I've been an Assassin for fucking years. How very dare you...
-->''(Cue Hannah kicking ass, proving that she '''does''' know how to be an Assassin and does not need the tutorial in any way!)''

-->'''Hannah''': I will add this - Evie and the men. Forget Edward and the ladies, ''Evie and the men.'' They '''''all''''' want her. ''(Spots a bookcase in the corner in front of a window.)'' What's going on with this bookcase? Why's it in front of a window? Weird...

* Hannah plays Assassin's Creed: Rogue and the following sentence occurs: "Hi pig, sorry pig!" - to note, she is ''literally '''jumping over a pig''''' as she says those words.

* Hannah plays Assassin's Creed Odyssey and, quiet nervously, laments "so, also, our tutorial is basically the Battle of Thermopylae! ''(Awkward Nervous Muttley snickering)'' Oh, ''shit...''"
* During her playthrough of the Arkham Origins DLC ''Cold Cold Heart'', the following sentence occurs: "You come here, you burn my shit, you take my butler, and you expect me to be okay with that? Well, I can tell you, mate, in the next ten seconds you're going to find out just how ''un''-okay I am about this whole situation!" ''(Cue Hannah '''choking''' the man holding Alfred hostage.)''

-->'''Hannah''': “Oh my God! It’s me!!”

-->'''Hannah''': That's what happens when you serve wine to unrefined bastards.

--->'''Hannah''': Is that? Is that Charles! Back there! Ch-Charles?! ''(she expresses pleasure at seeing Haytham and notes that "I recognise that hat".)'' Charles, you bastard! ''(more scenes occur)'' Charles, you little bugger, I’m watching you! ''(Hannah mentions she can "kind of forgive Haytham", because "it's Haytham")'' But Charles, Charles turned on me and I can never forgive him for that!

---> '''Kim and Hannah:''' AUGH!

---> '''Hannah''' ''(Eyes widening in a mix of glee and horror)'': Oh, good -
---> '''Hannah ''and'' Kim''' ''(in a gleeful voice that shows that they're both '''horrified and yet mildly intrigued at just how bad things can get''')'': Showers!
---> '''Kim''': Oh, that's always good in a prison!
---> '''Hannah''': Drop the soap...

---> '''Hannah''': Oh, fuck ''this!''

---> '''Hannah''' ''(casually climbing along a ledge outside the window; a piece of fabric looking rather like a hand swings out of the window.)'' '''AAIIII!''' ''(Miles jerks '''violently''' to the left, then Hannah realises what it is - namely, a curtain - and facepalms at her own actions)'' Oh!
---> '''Kim''': ''(Hyena cackle)''

---> '''Hannah''' (doing a silly dance to go with her singing)'': The Venga bus is comin' and everybody's jumpin' - oh, geez.

---> '''Kim:''' ''(acidly)'' Shall I just give you opposite directions from now on? Would that be easier?

---> '''Hannah''': Oh, no, that was really loud. That was ''really'' loud. He's gonna find me, isn't he? This was a bad call. ''(Trager, off screen, opens a different toilet cubicle).''
---> '''Kim''': It might be alright.
---> '''Hannah''': It won't be alright.
---> '''Kim''': I think you're alright.
---> '''Hannah''': ''*interrupting*'' It won't be alright.
---> '''Kim''': ''*continues*'' I think you're alright. ''*Hannah goes dead silent*'' I think you're alright, Hannah.
---> '''Hannah''': I'm hiding in the toilet, Kim. In a ''men's toilet''. From a man with a ''giant pair of scissors''.

---> '''Hannah:''' ''*Nonchalantly*'' It's fine! ''*to Trager*'' See ya, douchebag!

---> '''Hannah''': ''*Cheerfully*'' It's his bum! It's, uh, it's quite a ''textured'' bum.

---> '''Hannah''': Look! ''*Starts having a laughing breakdown*'' There's a body on fire in a sink! Oh, good!

** Chris pops up; Hannah steps into his line of sight in the dark and Kim despairs; Hannah proclaims it's fine because "he's an idiot!" and runs past him, exclaiming "see!?". He promptly chases them and Hannah and Kim nope the fuck out of there calling "Cheerie bye!" at Chris.

** The twosome discover Gluskin's table. Kim is ''absolutely disgusted'' and all Hannah can do is turn away.
** After reading a note which mentions that Waylon has "widened" his horizons, Kim exclaims that, as they've just come across a man's body ''with a vagina ripped into it'', that "widened is ''not the word we want to use here!"''

---> '''Hannah''': ''(zooming in on the object)'' What is that?

** Hannah tries a door. Gluskin appears with a "darling!" and the two ''almost die of absolute terror'' and panic massively when Hannah tries the door again by accident, thinking it'll open which leads to lots of flailing from both of them.

---> '''Gluskin''': A woman... has to suffer some things...
---> '''Kim''': I agree with ''that''!
---> '''Hannah''': Yep.
---> '''Gluskin''': It's not pleasant, I know.
---> '''Hannah''': I agree with ''that''.

---> '''Kim''': I'm alright actually, that's not the wors-''(Realising what is going on) Oh. Ohhh.''
---> '''Hannah''': ''What the fuck is this?''
---> '''Kim''': '''''Ohhhhh!'''''
---> '''Hannah''': Oh...
---> '''Kim''': You know how I said I was alright?
---> '''Hannah''': Oh.
---> '''Kim''': I'm not. ''(Now really terrified) This is his roo- it's Gluskin's room!''

** The twosome hear Gluskin. Kim, now rather annoyed, declares "get me a crowbar! I'm going to stove this guy's head in! I'm not a violent person, but, Jesus Christ, this guy!" and Hannah just nods in agreement.

---> '''Hannah''': No. Stop it. Don't do it. Don't break at the sink blood.

---> '''Mysterious Man''': You will do irrevocable damage to the company.
---> '''Kim''': ''Do it.''
---> '''Mysterious Man''': You might even get close to something like justice.
---> '''Kim''': '''Do it.'''
---> '''Mysterious Man''': But, once you click upload...
---> '''Kim''': '''''Do it!'''''

---> '''Kim''': Red Barrels. You guys. All you guys on this list. ''You!'' My god.
---> '''Hannah''': You are terrible yet wonderful people.
---> '''Kim''': I love you and hate you at the same time.

---> '''Kim''': Eddie Gluskin. This ''Graham Cuthbertson! (Kim shakes her fist in anger)''

** In part 18, Hannah is... surprised, to say the least... to hear a coffin be described as a "pine overcoat".

** The twosome come across a giant water tower. Hannah's reaction? "What the fuck is ''this!?"''