History Funny / Erfworld

* In the "Duke Forecastle" short story, the titular Duke is assigned as the first mate of the HMS Unsinkable II, his side's flagship, despite lacking the seafarer special (Ships can have a limited number of units assigned as crew. Each crew unit contributes to the ship's move, firepower, and other stats, but a unit without seafarer can only contribute a fraction of the value of an otherwise identical unit that does have seafarer). He is not told why his side has made such an illogical move, until eventually the Unsinkable II's captain lets him in on the secret: Nobody, including the Admiralty, has the slightest clue what he's doing there. They have assigned him where they did based solely on the fact that their greatest rival did the same thing and has won two impossible victories.

* How did we forget this? [[http://www.erfworld.com/book-1-archive/?px=%2F127.jpg Uncroaked infantry, lead by a master class Croakamancer... can.]]

** Because exactly how many webcomics use "4CHAN" as a sound effect for a golem made of poop self-destructing?

* [[spoiler: Stanley has a big introspective thought about the implications of Parson dying and the fact that he'll never be able to give Parson his own side someday... Then he gets distracted by Zhopa's comment about a "[[http://www.erfworld.com/book-2-archive/?px=%2F2013-05-06.png peekneek]]" and losing track of what [CloudCuckooLander he was thinking.]] Then proceeds to save Parson's butt [[CrouchingMoronHiddenBadass by being carried by his minion]] [[http://www.erfworld.com/book-2-archive/?px=%2F2013-05-13.jpg like a football.]]]]]]

* [[spoiler: Stanley has a big introspective thought about the implications of Parson dying and the fact that he'll never be able to give Parson his own side someday... Then he gets distracted by Zhopa's comment about a "[[http://www.erfworld.com/book-2-archive/?px=%2F2013-05-06.png peekneek]]" and losing track of what [CloudCuckooLander he was thinking.]] Then proceeds to save Parson's butt [[CrouchingMoronHiddenBadass by being carried by his minion like a football.]]]]

--> Tramennis: Brother, it pains me to see you this way.\\
Ossomer: Yes, I would imagine-\\
Tramennis: Ansom! Now Ansom could, admittedly, pull off the scarlet-and-black. But I'm sorry, that is an ''atrocious'' look on you.

Tramennis: Ansom! Now Ansom could, admittedly, pull off the scarlet-and-black. But I'm sorry, that is an '''atrocious''' look on you.

--->'''Parson:''' It involves turning this battle into a [[spoiler:food fight.]]
--->'''Jack:''' I see. Well! Bravo Lord! T'was a ''splendidly'' speedy defection.

* [[http://www.erfworld.com/book-1-archive/?px=%2F126.jpg 126]. Words ''ruin'' the hilarity.

* [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/erf0139.html 139]]. Words ''ruin'' the hilarity.

* [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/erf0146.html "Call it the last...of the last of the last stands."]] [[CSIMiami "YeeeaaaAAAAAAAAhhhh!"]]

* How did we forget this? [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/erf0140.html Uncroaked infantry, lead by a master class Croakamancer... can.]]

-->'''[=CharlsNChrg=]''': :(

-->'''[=CharlsNChrg=]''': :(

-->'''CharlsNChrg''': If an attuned wielder of an Arkentool were to croak, it would seem to be pretty compelling evidence that the Titans were not on their side. Don't you think?

-->'''CharlsNChrg''': Perhaps it's an experiment that ought to be carried out.
-->'''LordHamster''': Oh, Charlie...
-->'''LordHamster''': I know business sucks, but that's no reason to start talking about suicide.
-->'''CharlsNChrg''': ...
-->'''CharlsNChrg''': Parson, is it actually your goal to make me hate you more every time we chat?
-->'''LordHamster''': Me? I'm just talking.

-->'''LordHamster''': Sure.
-->'''LordHamster''': Determining the decision not to spend all the calculations. Cost: one calculation.
-->'''CharlsNChrg''': :)
-->'''LordHamster''': Teaching me that my bracer can make sophisticated predictions about the future? Priceless.
-->'''CharlsNChrg''': ...
-->'''CharlsNChrg''': :(

-->'''LordHamster''': Me? I'm just talking.

-->CharlsNChrg: If an attuned wielder of an Arkentool were to croak, it would seem to be pretty compelling evidence that the Titans were not on their side. Don't you think?

-->CharlsNChrg: Perhaps it's an experiment that ought to be carried out.
-->LordHamster: Oh, Charlie...
-->LordHamster: I know business sucks, but that's no reason to start talking about suicide.
-->CharlsNChrg: ...
-->CharlsNChrg: Parson, is it actually your goal to make me hate you more every time we chat?
-->LordHamster: Me? I'm just talking.

-->'''Narration''': And with no chance to engage and defend themselves, the culprits were now spending the night either running from the lascivious crotch-gropes of the uncroaked, or curling up in a corner somewhere and enduring them.

* In "Inner Peace (Through Superior Firepower)", Wanda is trapped in a city with the enemy, but the city is under a spell which prevents combat. While she is safe from enemy attacks, she is not safe from enemy... "[[IfYouKnowWhatIMean advances]]". The hilarious part is how she turns the tables on them, by having her uncroaked units do the same to them.

-->'''Jack''': Excellent! Sizemore, there's a new unit to be made in the Chief Warlord's trousers.