Recap / M*A*S*H S4 E12: Soldier of the Month

A mysterious fever has the post-op full and doctors scrambling to find a successful treatment. Meanwhile, Radar, Klinger, and other enlisted men compete for the grand prize in the "Soldier of the Month" contest, six days of R&R in Tokyo.

Attention all personnel! The winner of the Soldier of the Month contest will receive the following tropes:

• Bowdlerize: The syndicated airings of the episode usually leave out The Tag, where Radar shows up after his R&R in Tokyo drunk and in the custody of MP's, which B.J. and Hawkeye find hysterically funny.
• Cheaters Never Prosper: Klinger aims to win the contest by writing the answers on his arms and legs, but is foiled when Hawkeye mixes up the order of the questions. Radar eventually notices why he's contorting himself to answer every question.
• Cruel to Be Kind: The hemorrhagic fever sweeping trough the camp has an unfortunate symptom of shutting down the kidneys, and without urination, continuing to give thirsty patients water will cause them to almost literally drown in their own body tissue. Despite how much a patient may ask for water (Frank included), they can't have enough to satisfy their thirst and still live.
• He's Back!: When Frank, having gone to the latrine for the first time since recovering from the fever, walks past an orderly, he yells at the man for not saluting an officer. B.J. and Hawkeye note Frank is back to normal.
• Hidden Depths: Frank, delirious with the fever, shares a few details about his Abusive Parents and lonely childhood.
• Laser-Guided Karma: In retaliation for Frank leaving her just his clothes (see Silly Will below), after he's recovered, Margaret punches him out.
  Margaret: The next time you give your clothes away, give them to somebody your own size!
• Mouse Trap: Aiming to curry favour with "Soldier of the Month" judge Frank, Klinger helps him set rat traps throughout the camp - including one that snaps down on his fingers.
• Ripped from the Headlines: Korean hemorrhagic fever, a strain of hantavirus, affected over three thousand US soldiers in the Korean War, with a ten percent mortality rate.
• Sdrawkcab Name: When Klinger tries to answer the question about David Farragut ("Who said 'damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead?'"), he reads it backwards of his body, as "tugarraF."
• Self-Deprecation
  Fr. Mulcahy: I'm not sure about this [taking dictation on Frank's will]. Shouldn't a person be of sound mind when making a will?
  Frank: That's OK, Father. I don't think my mind was any sounder when I was well.
• Silly Will: Delirious with fever, Frank dictates a bizarre will to Father Mulcahy, detailing the whereabouts of hidden money and leaving Margaret his clothes.
• While You Were in Diapers: Frank directs a predictably self-centred variation towards B.J.
  Frank: I was suing people for payment before you even thought of being a doctor.
• White-Collar Crime: Frank in his delirious state admits via his will that's he participating in prescription kickback schemes (i.e., over-prescribing meds like tranquilizers for a cut of the profits) and tax evasion on those profits.