"I find the quiz aspect of this show to be overrated anyway."
—Paul Merton, Have I Got News for You
"Welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway, the show where everything is made up and the points don't matter! That's right, the points don't matter, just like (insert humorous comparison here)."
— Drew Carey, Whose Line Is It Anyway?
David Mitchell: And what do points mean?
Everyone: NOTHING!
Everyone: NOTHING!
— The Unbelievable Truth (not an actual example of the trope, just mocking the fact that there's no prize for winning)
"So, with everything to play for, except a prize, of course..."
David Mitchell: Our final round is on the buzzer.
Tim Kay: Is it still all to play for?
David Mitchell: By “all”—“nothing”...
— The Bubble the film!
Humphrey Lyttelton: So, with everything to play for...
[The entire panel and audience bursts into laughter]
Humphrey Lyttelton: I just remembered Samantha hasn't given us the score. Since 1981.
— I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue, in 1997.
Stephen Fry: I think we can all agree that nobody in this universe understands QI's scoring system.
—QI, "International" (Series I)
Simon Hoggart: But there's one vital question left that science has yet to answer. How on Earth does Maraika, our lovely News Quiz assistant, cope with my unique scoring system and telepathically know how many points to award at the end of each show?
—The News Quiz: The Very Best of 2004
Tom Scott: ...on that, congratulations, Chris, you win the show...
Chris: HAHAHA! Seems unlikely!
Tom: You got points.
Chris: Eh. Whatever!
[Gary makes a gesture that can best be described as "sure, leave me out of this!"]
Tom: On that note, congratula—
[Gary and Chris engage in some silent taunting]
Matt: Gary got the biscuits...
Tom: Yes, but the biscuits aren't points!
Matt: Oh no... yeah you got the points.
Chris: The POINTS are points!
Gary: You may have gathered, viewers, that this entire show is bullshit.
Tom: In so many different ways!
Chris: Except when he wins. Then it's really good, you'll notice.
Gary: Then it's brilliant!
Chris: HAHAHA! Seems unlikely!
Tom: You got points.
Chris: Eh. Whatever!
[Gary makes a gesture that can best be described as "sure, leave me out of this!"]
Tom: On that note, congratula—
[Gary and Chris engage in some silent taunting]
Matt: Gary got the biscuits...
Tom: Yes, but the biscuits aren't points!
Matt: Oh no... yeah you got the points.
Chris: The POINTS are points!
Gary: You may have gathered, viewers, that this entire show is bullshit.
Tom: In so many different ways!
Chris: Except when he wins. Then it's really good, you'll notice.
Gary: Then it's brilliant!
—Closing exchange from Citation Needed 3x01.
"You gained XXX EXP! (Not that it matters.)"
—Computer Virus, Kirby Super Star Ultra
Andy Zaltzman: "It's now ten to Team Sleaze, four to Team Ease"
Audience makes sympathetic noises
Andy:"What do you mean, aww? It should be clear by now, the scores don't...I just make them up! Ok, I'll give them a couple more. The scores are now ten to Team Sleaze, six to team Ease. That good enough for you people?"
Audience cheers
Audience makes sympathetic noises
Andy:"What do you mean, aww? It should be clear by now, the scores don't...I just make them up! Ok, I'll give them a couple more. The scores are now ten to Team Sleaze, six to team Ease. That good enough for you people?"
Audience cheers
—The News Quiz, S105 E1
