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History Quotes / ImplausibleDeniability

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->'''Perun:''' UsefulNotes/{{Iran}} is very clear that it does not have a nuclear weapons program. It just has a civilian program that keeps accidentally enriching uranium well above the levels required for civilian use, and close to weapons-grade. [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer And I'm actually entirely serious about part of that]]: When the International Atomic Energy Agency detected uranium enriched to an 83.7% level of purity, just shy of the roughly 90% you need to turn any timezone into a morning timezone with the click of a button, Iran's reported response was legitimately, quote:\\
'''Iran:''' The unintended fluctuations in enrichment levels may have occurred during transition periods at the time of commissioning the process of 60% product, all while replacing the feed cylinder.\\
'''Perun:''' I'll leave it to the audience to decide which option is scarier: A country deliberately making bomb-grade material, or a country doing it by accident.
-->-- '''Perun''', "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=COBDSmx9QDw Iran's Missile Strike on Israel - The attack, defence & Israel's counter-strike]]"
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-> '''Richard Rampton:''' ''[reading from [[PoliticallyIncorrectVillain David Irving]]'s diary]'' "Jessica is growing into a fine little lady. She sits very upright in an ordinary chair, a product of our walks to the bank, I am sure. On those walks, we sing the Binkety-Bankety-Bong Song. She stars in a poem when half-breed children wheel past." And then you go into italics. "I am a baby Aryan/Not Jewish or Sectarian/I have no plans to marry/An ape or Rastafarian." Racist, Mr. Irving? Anti-Semitic, Mr. Irving?\\
'''Davis Irving:''' I do not think so.\\
'''Rampton:''' Teaching your little child this kind of poison?\\
'''Irving:''' Do you think a nine-month old can understand words spoken in English, or any other sort of language?\\
'''Rampton:''' This poor little child has been taught a racist ditty by her racist and perverted father!\\
'''Irving:''' ''[smirks]'' Have you ever read Edward Lear? Creator/HilaireBelloc?\\
'''Rampton:''' They haven't brought a libel action, Mr. Irving, ''you'' have! You sued because you said we had called you a racist and an extremist.\\
'''Irving:''' Yes. But I am not a racist.\\
'''Rampton:''' Mr. Irving, ''look at the words on the page.''
-->-- ''Film/{{Denial}}''
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->'''Karin''': I don't see what the big deal is with ghosts. I don't even believe in them.\\
'''Yuzu''': Karin, I don't get how you can say something like that. I thought you had the power to see spirits too.\\
'''Karin''': [[LampshadeHanging I'm in permanent denial]]. Just ''seeing'' them doesn't make me ''believe'' in them.

to:

->'''Karin''': ->'''Karin:''' I don't see what the big deal is with ghosts. I don't even believe in them.\\
'''Yuzu''': '''Yuzu:''' Karin, I don't get how you can say something like that. I thought you had the power to see spirits too.\\
'''Karin''': '''Karin:''' [[LampshadeHanging I'm in permanent denial]]. Just ''seeing'' them doesn't make me ''believe'' in them.
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->I didn't do it. Nobody saw me do it. You can't prove anything.

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->I ->''"I didn't do it. Nobody saw me do it. You can't prove anything."''
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->'''Porter C. Powell:''' Don't touch anything! Since he went bankrupt, technically all this belongs to me.\\
''(Grimlock falls and wrecks everything.)''\\
'''Grimlock:''' ''(points to Optimus)'' Him did it.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TransformersAnimated'', "Black Friday"
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->'''Megatron:''' Ha-ha! Don't you just love watching those [[Main/AddedAlliterativeAppeal miserable, mechanical morons]] attempting to attack me, [[Main/EmbarrassingNickname Squidhead]]?\\
'''Thrust:''' ''(to himself)'' I wish he wouldn't call me that anymore. How would ''he'' like to be called "Flathead"? ''(snickers)''\\
'''Megatron:''' So why don't you share your little joke with everyone?\\
'''Thrust:''' Er, I wasn't, uh, laughing, sir. ''(to himself)'' "Flathead". Boy, I can really dish it out! ''(snickers)''\\
'''Megatron:''' You... are a ''freak''.
-->-- ''Anime/TransformersArmada'', "Crisis"
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[[folder:Newspaper Comics]]

->'''Chazz:''' Hey, Poncho. You're not upset that I went on a date, are you?\\
'''Poncho:''' ''(sulking)'' No, not at all, why would I be upset?\\
'''Chazz:''' What's this stain on the carpet?\\
'''Poncho:''' I had an "accident".\\
'''Chazz:''' It looks like grape juice. And also ketchup. And soy sauce. ''(looking at the message spelled "GRRRR" on the carpet)'' You sure you're not upset?
-->-- ''ComicStrip/PoochCafe''

[[/folder]]
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->'''Nezu:''' You're Oboro Shirakumo?\\
'''Kurogiri:''' I believe so. My memories are starting to come back.\\
'''Aizawa:''' He's definitely Oboro. No relation at all to the villain who attacked U.S.J.\\
'''Present Mic:''' He had amnesia after his accident. He's been in the hospital for years. He's an innocent.\\
'''Nezu:''' Coincidentally, he has the same quirk as the villain Kurogiri.\\
'''Aizawa:''' Total coincidence.\\
'''Nezu:''' ''[turns to Tomura]'' Just like how this young man resembles Tomura Shigaraki.\\
'''All Might:''' Nonsense! This is my nephew, Tenko Shimura. They're clearly different people. This particular NEET gamer doesn't have a hand over his face. And he has better skin.
-->-- ''[[https://archiveofourown.org/works/38084278 Corgizuku]]''
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->Accounts vary widely as to what happened that day in Dawson City...\\
Metal fatigue! That's how the explained it later! Those smokestacks must have had weak spots in their bases! ''Both'' of them!\\
It was a bit more difficult to explain what caused the concert grand piano to go sailing through the imported stained-glass window!\\
But it wasn't too hard to account for the fire that broke out! What else would one expect when a cast-iron stove crashes through three bulkheads?\\
Some said Slick's riverboat was demolished by a freak tidal wave from the Bering sea- twelve hundred miles downriver!
-->--''ComicBook/TheLifeAndTimesOfScroogeMcduck'''s narration on ComicBook/ScroogeMcDuck singlehandedly tearing apart a steamboat

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->''How ya fi give the woman access to your villa?\\
Trespasser and a witness all the hacklin' a yuh pillow\\
You better watch your back before she turn into a killa\\
Best review the situation that you caught up inna\\
To be a true player you haffi know how fi play\\

to:

->''How ya fi give the woman access to your villa?\\
Trespasser and a witness all the hacklin' a yuh pillow\\
You better watch your back before she turn into a killa\\
Best review the situation that you caught up inna\\
->'''Shaggy:''' To be a true player you haffi know how fi play\\



But she caught me on the counter (It wasn't me)\\

to:

'''[=RikRok=] (and Shaggy):''' But she caught me on the counter (It wasn't me)\\



She stayed until it was over''
-->-- '''Shaggy''', "It Wasn't Me"

to:

She stayed until it was over''
over
-->-- '''Shaggy''', "It Wasn't Me"
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->'''Ashton:''' When you leave the site of an ''explosion'', covered in blood, [[LampshadeHanging there is]] ''[[LampshadeHanging nothing]]'' [[LampshadeHanging more suspicious]] than saying "I didn't hear or see anything!" Just say "Yeah, that shit was crazy, and I don't know what the fuck happened, but we're bleeding and going home!" We're gonna get caught! Motherfuckers!\\
'''Fearne:''' Well, for as far as they knew, we just had a wild night.
-->-- ''WebVideo/CriticalRole''
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-> ''Photos'' can easily be altered. But videos? That's some Creator/JamesCameron shit.
-->-- '''Creator/JonStewart''', ''Series/TheDailyShowWithJonStewart'', on Toronto mayor Rob Ford saying that "videos can be altered" upon the release of the video of him smoking crack cocaine
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->'''O'Callaghan:''' No! ''[adjusts his wig]''

to:

->'''O'Callaghan:''' '''O'Callaghan:''' No! ''[adjusts his wig]''
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->'''Judge Budreau:''' Now, we have a charge of wearing a three-coloured vest.\\
'''Garnet:''' ''[still wearing the vest]'' Where's your evidence?
-->-- ''WebVideo/{{Oxventure}}: TabletopGame/{{Deadlands}}'', "The Town That Dreaded Justice"
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->'''Olympia:''' ''[as she's holding two bowls of soup in her hands]'' Why are you standing?\\
'''Otis:''' Why are you our waiter?\\
'''Olympia:''' Uh...I'm not. I'm just a helpful customer.
-->-- ''Series/OddSquad'', "[[Recap/OddSquadS2E3MidDayInTheGardenOfGoodAndOddFailureToLunch Failure to Lunch]]"
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->'''Agent:''' Is that a wig?\\
->'''O'Callaghan:''' No! ''[adjusts his wig]''
-->-- ''Series/OddSquad'', ''[[Recap/OddSquadS1E16OddOutbreakThePerfectLunch Odd Outbreak]]''

->'''Olive:''' ''[as she approaches Otto, who has a broken and taped-up badge phone]'' Partner, what happened to your badge?\\
'''Otto:''' Oh, nothing.\\
''[Olive puts on a disbelieving expression]''\\
'''Otto:''' Okay, fine. I may have dropped it, and it may have broken in half, and I may have tried to fix it, and I may have dropped it while I was trying to fix it.\\
'''Olive:''' You should get it repaired.\\
'''Otto:''' Eh, no need. See?\\
''[he takes the badge phone and [[EpicFail crushes it in his hand]], causing it to crumble to pieces]''\\
'''Otto:''' Yeah, okay, I'll get it repaired.
-->-- ''Series/OddSquad'' (in a two-for-one deal), "[[Recap/OddSquadS1E30NoIfsAndsOrRobotsWorstFirstDayEver No Ifs, Ands, or Robots]]"

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