Film Teenage Megan Ninja Fox
Teenage Megan Ninja Fox! Teenage Megan Ninja Fox! Woman In A Tube Top! Megan Power!...
You know the critic reviews for this movie; "Utter Shit!" Unanimously. It now has the same Rotten Tomatoes score as TMNT 3; I thought it couldn't be that shit could it? Surely most of it is hate for Micheal Bay and Megan Fox...It's not.
April O'neal has more screen time than the Turtles and is never not on screen for longer than five minutes. Now people like April O'neal...Check Deviantart...People really like April. But people hate Megan Fox and she has to exposition some really stupid shit that no actress could make sound good.
The plot...I don't care if you shut your brain off, your other working senses will urge you to ask...Why? Eric Sacks and Shredder want to attack Manhattan with a chem bomb...Why? To extort the government for money...Why? They're clearly already billionaires and there are easier ways to game the system. Shredder wants to take over Manhattan using said plot...Why?
Even worse, Hamato Yoshi does not exist in this movie, The Turtles and Splinter have no connection to japanese culture in the slightest. So for the first time ever despite countless cartoons, movies and comicbooks; I ask...HOW DO THEY HAVE JAPANESE KATANA AND SAI IN THE SEWERS?...Did Splinter find them? Did Splinter make them? Real ones? In Manhattan?
It is extremely obvious Eric Sacks was supposed to be Shredder, but they scrambled at the last second to change it. Shredder is a Generic Dooms Day Villain because they had to cast some random asian in the role at the last minute.
The film is at it's strongest near the end where the Turtles, get to be the Turtles. [Watch this scene.
] That's the characters you love, just being themselves. Longer scenes like that would made this film a bit more enjoyable, but no...can't go five minutes without Megan in it.
I like the Turtles new "On Steriods" design, But I admit you can't call them ninjas. Just because the Hulk attacks you in the dark. Don't mean it was stealthy.
This Movie is too interested in giving terrible exposition to develop their (terrible) characters in any way. And in the ending they basically go "Yeah! We're getting a sequel! Suck it!"
I sincerely hope they don't.
Film Knock Knock, you about to get shell-shocked.
(spoilers ahead)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I've been a fan of this franchise since its first cartoon (though I'll admit my favorite incarnation is the 2003 cartoon), and as such I decided to give the live-action movie a shot.
Turn out, it's actually pretty solid. The plot, as far as it goes, is pretty much Excuse Plot for seeing the Foot Clan duke out with the Turtles for the most part, but it fulfills its purpose I suppose. As long as you don't come to the movie to watch amazing plot twists, you should be fine. There are some interesting details in it as far as franchise mythos goes (I liked the idea of April being connected to the Turtle's origins, or the Mutagen being a recurring deal).
I believe there are two areas where this movie truly shines: the characterization; The Turtles (and Splinter) are in top form, and a riot to watch every time they're on-screen, be it fighting or just bickering amongst themselves (Splinter, in particular, is just a full plate of pure awesomeness), and the action scenes. In the history of the franchise there have been few fight scenes as well-made as the ones in this movie, you get to see their martial arts styles in full display, and the movie is very creative with how they use their weapons and the enviroment in battles.
On non-turtle-or-splinter characterization, the movie's a double-edged knife. April is actually very well-characterized, but Megan Fox is not one actress to expect much of, The Shredder manages to be very imposing and menacing, but never gets real characterization for the most part, Eric Sachs is pretty much a random Corrupt Corporate Executive.
Still, it's a solid movie. It does what it set out to do: Be a movie about teenage mutant ninja turtles and their clashes against the Foot Clan, and be entertaining while doing it. Works for me.
PS: The main song, as noted by the review's title, is pretty much a unholy storm of Narm Charm and Ear Worm fused together. In some ways you could say it's a good representation of what the movie is actually like.
8/10.
Film If you're disappointed, you deserve to be.
Because honestly, if you expected anything even resembling half-decent entertainment... this has got to be your first Michael Bay movie ever. Even now that you've (hopefully) realized that TMNT is a stupid, yet perfectly harmless, un-pretentious, and still extremely likeable IP that can still turn out pretty damn solid in the right hands, you should've just dropped your expectations to sub-zero variables the second Mr. Bay's was mentioned in conjunction with the project.
Just like his Transformers work of earlier times, any semblance to any nostalgic values you attached to your decades-old fandom are harder to find than nutrients in a cereal aisle. Using every harried old trope in the Grimdark-but-still-PG-13-reboot toolbox, TMNT just comes across as a film that wasn't made, but simply manifested as a result of the cinema trends of its day. One day, some producer just found the script lying neatly on his desk. Nobody knows who wrote it or why, the guy just figured they might as well make the movie, and a couple of bucks. And... here we are.
Hey, I'm just thankful they didn't turn Donnie into a racist black stereotype or anything. Sometimes I wonder if dear old Mr. Ratner was paid to kill his own directorial career just to make people think, "Hey, Bay sure has his faults and all, but at least he's not a homophobic douchebag!" and forget all of the exceedingly problematic world views and stereotypes found in his movies as a result.
For these and a myriad of other reasons, it is a futile point to debate anything specific in the movie, because you could merely replace any references to TMNT in this review with Transformers one, and all points would still stand. I can't view nor critique it as a piece of entertainment, because it's simply not. As a mirror of mainstream blockbuster cinema of today, however, it at least merits some pondering and reflection.
Lastly, the leading lady... Samantha Fox or something? Well, anyway, her. She's still pretty much the blandest female face you can put on a screen. I literally can't recall what she even looks like. So yeah, if you're into that you've at least got some sort of reason to waste your time on this forgettable waste of... err, time.
Film Megan Fox And Some Turtle Dudes
This film WON "Worst Supporting Actress" with Megan Fox, and I know why. The presence of her drags down the ENTIRE movie, because she is the focus for the entire movie. Why do I complain? Because she's around so much. There're barely 5 minutes without her. Are there really so few attractive acresses in Hollywood? Does Bay owe her money? At least in Transformers she was only eye candy; here she plays a central character.
That's right, she punctuates the whole film. It starts with 15 minutes spent focusing on how she's like to get a big scoop. We don't need that; we KNOW it'll be the turtles. It's almost 25 minutes before we get a good view of the Turtles.
I'm always willing to forgive a change of backstory - being made in a lab isn't that far removed from the original story. But then they had to screwdiver April into it. She isn't just the daughter of the top scientist who plays with them. She's also the one who saved them from a lab fire. Which means that she must also be the one who dropped them in the sewer, but they don't go into that.
She's li'l miss exposition; almost everything is seen from her eyes. She does a horrible amount of saving of the Turtle's lives. She also provides their vitally needed transport. And she kicks Shredder off a building.
Time spent with the Turtles is always interesting. Unfortunately plenty of that is also spent discussing April. A lot of people complained that the Turtles weren't developed enough. Well OF COURSE they weren't. All that screentime was spent on how April is so important.
If April had to be so very important, couldn't they have hired a better actress? Megan Fox visibly degrades the entire film with her performance (such as it is). Her face is made of wax and her sole expression in this movie is 'Stunned surprise'. She is cast as April because she can LOOK the part, not act it, (even though she doesn't look the part a lot either) and because we all remember her from Transformers. At not one moment in the movie is her hair or makeup out of place, whether it's in the sewers or sliding down a mountain-side.
Even the 10 year old playing her as young would have made a better April.
Film Amazing movie & a worth of money!!
Jonathan liebesman's teenage ninja turtles 2014 is a good watch.
It has evenly paced comedy and action sequences. It is consistent to the tv series and comics.
A fan with pre-meditative image will not be disappointed.
Megan fox could have dropped some more hotness on screen. her role is dry and low.
I think there should be more sequels to this movie as it holds lot of potential.
The action was fresh and stands out to most of the action film!
although i have written a lot of review, on detailed is on my page, it contains some spoilers. If you would like to check it out :
http://theoutofbusiness.com/2014/09/05/junkmans-movie-review-teenage-mutant-ninja-turtles-2014/
Thanks