The Amazing Atheist

Okay, hold on, I need to see this ship in writing. I demand to see The Amazing Atheist and Jack Chick in a romantic story.

The emotions of others can seem like such well guarded mysteries, people 8egin to 8elieve that's how their own emotions should 8e treated.

It's a Friday night and I don't have anywhere to be, I'll get on it.

This is probably the birth of something beautiful and horrifying at the same time.

Kind of like yin yang, except both sides are assholes and trying to strangle each other in a hateful, loving manner.

The emotions of others can seem like such well guarded mysteries, people 8egin to 8elieve that's how their own emotions should 8e treated.

Wouldstill be a better love story than Twilight.

You people are crazy. Crazy Awesome.

If I'm actually going to write this, I'll probably need a while to come up with an idea that isn't lame.

Amazing Chick

An old religious bigot and a younger anti-theist bigot share a room together. The younger one, disappointed with being unable to score, decides to do it with the older one. But when they take off each other pants, they find their junk unusable. The old one cut his off long ago and the younger one was Blessed with Suck by having a penis the size of his little toe. The younger one says "Fuck me and fuck Christ" and jumps out the door. The old one expires five minutes later when his warranty runs out and the battery fries.

The End

More Buscemi at http://forum.reelsociety.com/

This may be the best idea I have ever come up with.

When this fic is written, it shall define Foe Yay on a scale previously unknown to humankind!

Go play Kentucky Route Zero. Now.

Nah fic goes like this... they both meet walking down the street, the amazing atheist walking from a bar to insult to a church to insult some church goers and Jack Chick walking from a church to a bar to insult some sinners.

The two lock eyes and prepare for a fight that would surely go down in the history books. The two titans of self righteous fury both pull thier weapons, Jack wielding his deadly throwing tracts and AA wielding the Evolutionary flail, yelling as they prepare to attack both combatants stop in horror as the yaoi fairy pops out from a near by bush. Yelling "You two are so kawaii" she glitter bombs them both.

Cut to a seedy motel interior. Both of are titans are locked in a different struggle. A struggle of hot man on man passion. The atheist beats out a mighty fleshy rythm using his [the next five paragraphs were redacted for sanity reasons] and the slimy old man lets out one last gasp of pleasure. The two look each other in the eye when tragedy strikes. The sex was so amazing The amazing atheist had a religious experience and has found god, while at the same time Jack has become an atheist out of hatred of a god who could say gay sex is evil.

Thus both missing the point, they both now hate each other, but still, they are madly in love. Both leave in tears, presumably to kill themselves. Oh and I guess the fairy was hiding in the vent jilling to this or something, I don't know.

edited 10th Feb '12 10:59:42 PM by TheDeadMansLife

Please.

At some point, one of them has to cast Mind Bondage.◊

Is this a meme yet?

I see it everywhere.

I'm having to learn to pay the price

No, Twilight Sucks is a meme despite most people never actually touching it. Every romance is better than Twilight is the resulting logical conclusion based on the evidence in people's minds.

Also, I can't wait for this fan fic to materialize.

edited 11th Feb '12 4:14:16 PM by Ramus

The emotions of others can seem like such well guarded mysteries, people 8egin to 8elieve that's how their own emotions should 8e treated.

After some extensive research...

It is a meme.

Anyway, back to the AA/JC crackfic that is glorious.

edited 11th Feb '12 4:24:51 PM by PippingFool

I'm having to learn to pay the price

I think everyone's being too hard on TAA. The guy's fighting against oppression and everyone treats him like a pariah. So what if he said some bad things on Reddit? Now, they were bad, but on Reddit stuff like that gets said all the time.

Everyone wants to uses him as a scapegoat against atheists and it's insulting.

He said the woman's rapist should be awarded a medal. I don't care what hive of scum and villainy place you say it in, shit like that shouldn't be defended.

Here are some selected quotes again.

Yeah. Well, you deserved it. So, fuck you. I hope it happens again soon. I’m tired of being treated like shit by you mean little cunts and then you using your rape as an excuse. Fuck you. I think we should give the guy who raped you a medal.

Is that kind of like the way that rapists dick went in your pussy? Or did he use your asshole? Or was it both? Maybe you should think about it really hard for the next few hours. Relive it as much as possible. You know? Try to recall: was it my pussy or my ass?

BTW, you have to admit, when I told you that I hope you drown in rape semen, you got a little wet, didn’t you? It’s okay. We’re friends now. You can share.

He asked a rape victim to relive her rape, then implied she'd gotten off on it. Gee, the poor persecuted sweetheart.

Besides, you seen some of the other shit on reddit (links in thread not safe for work, sanity, or anything)? Implying that what he said is the norm for the place is a condemnation, not a defence.

edited 12th Feb '12 11:11:14 AM by Iaculus

What's precedent ever done for us?

edited 12th Feb '12 1:28:36 PM by randomtropeloser

Oh, you laugh now, but just wait until those evil feminazis grind you under their heels for daring to suggest that their lives might be improved by a good rapin'. He told you, he did, but did you believe him? Did you hell.

uggghhhh

What's precedent ever done for us?

I deleted my post because I don't want to start an argument.

To be fair on the guy, he's stated that he regrets saying those things (obviously, considering all the backlash it got him) and as The Distressed Watcher he's a tad more "tame". Sometimes.

At least he's gotten a lot more decent these days.

edited 12th Feb '12 1:34:48 PM by ThatOneGuyNamedX

Graphic rape threats are 'a lot more decent'? Mother of Odin, what was he like before?

What's precedent ever done for us?

ever since then I mean.

He has issued an extremely whiny, grudging, and self-centered apology.

Clearly he regrets the backlash, not the statements.

All I'm sayin' is that it's a bit hypocritical to keep taking pot shots at the guy at every opportunity and then complain of his bitterness and attitude towards the world. I'm not painting him as a Jerk Ass Woobie, but every problem with more than one party involved (in this case, AA vs. The whole non-Jerkass world) can't be solved until one party decides to take the first step. Maybe if someone sat down and talked to the guy rationally about what's wrong about his... everything, he'd listen to reason. No smart human being can seriously be beyond the power of LOGIC!

... you've seen what he posted, right?

After that shit, it's his obligation to make that first step, and a grudging backpedal that he refused to make public is not it.

There are, in fact, things that deserve ostracism. What he did was one of them, and he doesn't seem to have recognised it yet. Nobody but him has any obligation to him to fix his ridiculously broken world-view for him.

What's precedent ever done for us?

I don't think that anyone here bears any ill will towards TAA — or towards Jack Chick, for that matter.

Yeah, we are expressing strong disapproval at what TAA said, and we are also poking some fun at him; but really, he's not some sort of public enemy, he's someone who posted something outrageously stupid and offensive on the 'net.

And really, it's not like he was the only one — while I never reached such levels, I do remember some posts of mine that make me wish I could travel back in time and give myself a good smack...

EDIT:

And now you know how Christians feel roughly 90% of the times Jack Chick or the Westboro Baptist Church are brought up.

But I agree, what TAA said has no bearing whatsoever on the intellectual debates between atheists and religious people. "That guy on your side is a bit of a dick" is not much of an argument, after all...

edited 13th Feb '12 3:31:31 AM by Carciofus

But they seem to know where they are going, the ones who walk away from Omelas.