Suspect Is Hatless / Western Animation

• Archer, when Archer helps a group of illegal immigrants in "Coyote Lovely", using the 1973 Chevy Bel Air station wagon ISIS supplied him, Lana and Cyril for the mission, Malory has Bilbo look search for it via satellite, but only tells him it's a station wagon and it's in Texas. Bilbo pulls up images of random wagons and snarkily asks if each is the right car.^note One of them is the right car, as Archer has his head out of the window, but no-one is looking due to arguing.
• Bob's Burgers: In "Tweentrepreneurs", Bob's Burgers is the victim of a dine-and-dash. Teddy tries to draw a facial composite of the dine-and-dasher based on what he and Linda can remember about his looks. All they can remember is that he had two eyes and a nose.
• Bromwell High: Invoked by Natella, when Latrina wants to be a police officer. Natella points out that Latrina is too unobservant for the job. Natella has their mutual friend Keisha strike her, then asks Latrina to describe her attacker. Despite just witnessing the assault, and being longtime friends with Keisha, the only thing she can remember was that the attacker was black.
• An early episode of The Cleveland Show has this cutaway gag:
  Cleveland: Oh, I don't know what to do. This is harder than trying to identify a rapist at a Star Trek convention.
  * A woman is talking to two cops at the convention
  Cop 1: Could you describe the assailant?
  Victim: Yes. He was a white male, glasses, bad skin, about 50 pounds overweight smelled like Cheetos, and was carrying a poster with a Sharpie Pen.
  Cop 2:I know what to do. (They turn to face a large crowd of Trekkies) Who here is not a virgin? (A single hand goes up in the back of the crowd) You're under arrest.
• On Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, the gang tries to find a friend's missing owner, but the description they get from him is that the boy has two eyes, two ears and one nose, and is wearing clothes. He adds that he is wearing a pointy hat, but that's no help since he's at a birthday party and everyone's wearing a pointy hat.
• In the Hey Arnold! episode "Harold's Bar Mitzvah," Arnold and Harold find a crying child who's lost his mother. When asked to describe her, he replies that she's "tall and has hair." Fortunately they had already seen the mother frantically looking for her son and didn't need a more detailed description.
• In Johnny Bravo, Johnny is accused of stealing cookies stolen by another man he saw. When asked about him, Johnny says that he has two arms. In Johnny's defense, this was a great shout-out to The Fugitive.
• In the King of the Hill episode where Hank's father runs of to Las Vegas to not deal with the responsibility of supporting his pregnant wife and incoming son. While looking for him, Hank asks a card dealer:
  Hank: Excuse me, have you seen an old man, about "yay-high" [holds hand up to chest height], possibly yelling obscenities.
  Dealer: Ugh! welcome to my world...
  [Camera pans to reveal a bunch of grumbling old men arguing with their exasperated wives and the hapless table dealers]
• The 1934 Mickey Mouse short The Dognapper has the police chief give officers Mickey and Donald a description of dognapper Pete's car: "Four wheels, two headlights, driver in front seat."
• On My Life as a Teenage Robot, episode "See No Evil", Jenny gets descriptions from several people in the crowd, that are all things like "he had a coat and a hat" before someone finally goes, "I remember — he was invisible!"
• In Snowball's introductory episode in Pinky and the Brain, the Brain asks Pinky to describe Snowball. While Pinky does note a defining detail (he had a tattoo on his leg underneath his fur), his description beforehand was delivered in an... interesting manner:
  Pinky: Ooh. Well, he had two eyes and—and... oh, a mouth right below his nose.
  Brain: [disappointed] How very descriptive.
• Rick and Morty: In "The Ricklantis Mixup", which takes place on the Citadel of Ricks, a Morty police officer and his rookie partner (a Rick) are investigating a robbery at a Mortytown convenience store and ask the owner to describe the robbers.
  Shopkeeper Morty: They were—They were about my height, around 14 years old... Oh, their shirts were yellow!
  Officer Morty: (to his partner) Yeah, make sure you get that down.
  Officer Rick: Any mutations? Augmentations? Three eyes, a tail, maybe a buzzcut?
  Shopkeeper Morty: No, just four normal Mortys.
  Alien Janitor Morty: Normal?!
  Shopkeeper Morty: Put it in your blog!
• The Simpsons:
  • The Trope Namer is in "Homer's Triple Bypass", when Chief Wiggum was pursuing the criminal Snake and states that the suspect is "hatless".
    Homer: I can't wait 'till they throw his hatless butt in jail.
  • In "Separate Vocations" Lou and Eddie are perusing Snake's car after he robbed the Kwik-E-Mart, this scene and the page quote above seems to show that the Springfield police officers are bad at identifying cars.
    Eddie: Suspect is driving a red... car!
  • Another episode, "Marge on the Lam", had him trying to give his current position to another officer over the radio.
    Chief Wiggum: Oh, um... I'm, uh, I'm on a road. Uh, looks to be asphalt. Um, ah geez. Trees. Shrubs. I'm directly under the Earth's Sun... now!
  • In "Kiss Kiss, Bang Bangalore", Homer tries to find Apu's cousin Kavi, who is "medium height, dark complexion, brown eyes and black hair". The trouble is, he's in India. Luckily he only has to ask two passersby if they're Kavi.
  • In The Saga of Carl, Homer and friends look for Carl in Iceland.
    Moe: Say, have you seen our friend? He's about this tall, wears a jacket, has no visible tattoos...
    Homer: Just say he's black.
    Moe: You say he's black!
  • There's an episode where Milhouse needs help finding his girlfriend at her school, and describes her blue plaid jumper. Since that's the school uniform, every girl is wearing it.
• South Park: When Butters' mom tries to drown him, she blames his disappearance on "some Puerto Rican guy" of average Puerto Rican height.
• In Sym-Bionic Titan, after Octus crashes into a store while trying to rescue Lance and Ilana from G3, he tries to investigate the area where they vanished at, while the store-owner describes Octus' human-disguise to the cops. Octus quickly alters his appearance as the police take notes to not draw attention.
• In The Venture Brothers one episode sees Dr Orpheus get a promotional video from the Guild soliciting him to hire an Arch-Nemesis. He asks his daughter who delivered it, and she replies: "I dunno, some guy in a winter coat, and techno-goggles. Oh, and he had, like, pipes coming out of him."

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