Innocently Insensitive / Live-Action TV

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Innocently Insensitive in Live-Action TV.

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• Sherlock Holmes has a big moment of this in the second episode of The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson, during the scene with Watson's pocket watch. Brilliant as Holmes is, he hadn't anticipated that discussing Watson's ill-fated alcoholic brother might upset him.
• Alex Rider (2020): Alex to Kyra when she comes to his school in the last episode. He asks about her parents, not realising they've been murdered. She doesn't tell him.
• The Baby-Sitters Club (2020):
  • There's no malicious intent when the other girls nag Mary Anne to be more assertive in Episode 4, but the way they do it still comes off as rather inconsiderate since they should know how sensitive she is at this point. Sure enough, Mary Anne is driven to tears and runs off. It goes From Bad to Worse when her father misunderstands the situation to be bullying-related and tells the other girls' parents his interpretation of events, leading to them getting grounded and understandably angry at Mary Anne.
  • The nurse and doctor who treat Bailey Delvecchio refer to her as a boy based on her chart and medical file. This clearly upsets Bailey, so Mary Anne takes the two aside to gently but firmly call them out on what they're doing and makes them understand Bailey is a girl and needs to be acknowledged as such regardless of her chart. The doctor and nurse are quietly chastised and apologize for their unintentional rudeness.
• The Big Bang Theory:
  • Sheldon doesn't always realize that he's being condescending about others' intellect.
  • His mom is this in another way. Mrs. Cooper is the type of stereotypical Born Again Christian who would be likely to tell someone You Are a Credit to Your Race or use an outdated, racist term (Leonard eventually has to make her a list of what she can't say). That said, she's so sweet and comforting (unlike her son) that you know she doesn't mean anything by it; it's just a side effect of being born and raised in east Texas.
• The Bisexual: Leila disparages English people after first meeting Sadie, but she then learns Sadie's English (apparently not having recognized her accent as being from Northern England as Leila's a foreigner).
• Leslie Stevens of black•ish often makes politically incorrect comments which are also often factually incorrect, which frequently exasperates Andre. His role in the show is to represent the privileged white person out of touch with the issues of people of color and cultures outside of his own.
• In Black Snow, one of the snippets from the time capsule video shows Chloe Walcott saying that Ashford should have been named after her family, because their mill drove the economy for the region and therefore Ashford would not exist without her family. Isabel Baker, who is descended from people who were enslaved in that mill, can be seen glaring at her.
• The Book of Boba Fett: Boba Fett catches himself while doing this with Skad, who has a conspicuous cybernetic eye, when Boba says "Keep an eye on them" during Skad's recon report the Pykes' arrival. Skad takes no offense, though.
• Breaking Bad: In "Breakage", the hospital secretary gives Walt a pin saying "hope is the best medicine" after another round of chemotherapy. However, this is right after giving Walt an incredibly expensive hospital bill (just for that session and with a discount) and the fact Walt's cancer is terminal, so it unintentionally comes off as extremely insulting. Walt tosses the pin in the trash the moment he's out the door, since he has absolutely nothing to be hopeful about.
• In Bridgerton, Eloise's behaviour towards her best/Only Friend Penelope is often this. The basic issue is that, while Eloise and Penelope are both outcasts, only Eloise is an outcast by choice. Eloise, as the second daughter of a prominent family, is a fairly desirable catch in the marriage market yet takes pride in deliberately not participating in the social scene; meanwhile, Penelope desperately wants the social acceptance, romance and marriage but is unlikely to get it due to her family's lower station than the Bridgertons, as well as being awkward and overweight. Basically, Eloise has everything Penelope wants and can't have at her fingertips and makes a great show of not taking it. This is obviously very upsetting to Penelope, but Eloise is oblivious because she assumes Penelope feels the same way she does.
  • A good example of this would be during the first party that they attend together. Multiple handsome young men ask Eloise to dance and the Alpha Bitch offers her a place in the Girl Posse; all right in front of Penelope and without even acknowledging her. Eloise dismissively brushes them all off, while Penelope's distraught expression just screams "what about me!?".
• The Brittas Empire: Gordon Brittas. Yes, he is an absolute prick, insults people and can start fights very easily, but the show makes it clear that he only ever has good intentions and that it is more a combination of his stupidity and lack of people skills that lead to chaos.
• Castle: Subverted in "Once Upon a Time in the West". Castle and Beckett, dressed as cowboys while staying at a dude ranch, go to the neighboring First Nations reservation to see if they know anything about the Body of the Week. A native rancher stops them at the gate and grouches at them about their costumes, given the history of the West. Castle and Beckett get Oh, Crap! looks... and then the rancher grins: he just wanted to mess with them a bit, and invites them inside.
• Cheers:
  • Diane, on the occasions she's not just genuinely displaying Lack of Empathy, can be socially clueless. For example, once asking Frasier if he could understand what it's like to be humiliated by the love of his life. Diane dumped Frasier at the altar. Frasier's response? "Gee, I'll try."
  • Happens to Diane again on her reappearance in Frasier. Her attempt at making small-talk with Frasier's dad does not get off to a roaring start when he brings up how in the time since they last met, his wife died, he had to retire because he got shot in the hip, and then move in with Frasier because he was incapable of looking after himself.
    Diane: Well, you look good. (pats him on the leg) Yes, you do.
    Martin: That's the bad leg.
    (Diane scrunches up her fists in embarrassment)
  • Woody, being a ditz of the highest order, occasionally runs into this, recalling something someone might not want said in the most oblivious fashion possible, like reminding Sam of his alcoholism.
• Control Z: Quintanilla's secretary, Lulú, compliments whoever did Isabela's sex reassignment surgery, remarking "you can't even tell" and then proceeding to misgender her.
• Reid from Criminal Minds sometimes falls into this trap, mostly because his social skills aren't great and, therefore, he tends to forget about them when he gets really excited or is concentrating on something. For example, at one point the team is tracking a killer who has kidnapped a young girl that Morgan is very attached to. Rossi worries that a radio announcement might lead the killer to change vehicles. Reid gets about halfway through brightly saying, "Or he might kill the kid!" before seeing the look on Morgan's face and quickly backtracking.
• The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance: Even as well as Brea means, a lifetime of royal privilege has left her with some preconceptions about the different clans she has to work to unlearn.
• Doctor Who:
  • The Twelfth Doctor has this as a Running Gag. Once an Episode in Series 8, he attempts to compliment Clara's appearance in a way that would reveal he has absolutely no understanding of human beauty or feelings — like asking why she's wearing high heels because there's no reason for her to be taller, or assuming she's taken off her makeup while she's obviously still wearing loads before kindly advising her that it's what's on the inside that counts.
    • Clara has taken to writing cue cards for him to read with comments appropriate to a given situation by Series 9.
  • Clara was prone to this with Danny Pink, an ex-soldier, at one point even joking about him killing people, which pushes his Berserk Button.
  • Other incarnations of The Doctor have had this, as well. Generally, the more "abrasive" personalities are most guilty. However, since he also uses it to put others off their game, it's not always clear if/when it's intentional.
• Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23: Naïve Newcomer June, a recent Midwestern transplant, brags in one cold opening about how well she's adjusting to life in The Big Rotten Apple, including learning a cute new name for Jewish people. She's then seen greeting an Orthodox Jew with "Hello, Hebraham."
• Downton Abbey: The Duchess of Yeovil visits the house in Season 4 and happily strikes up a conversation with Tom. She offers her condolences for Sybil's death, and while she's trying to sympathize (having lost her husband), it just opens up the still healing wounds of her passing. She also talks to him at length about the Anglo-Irish Aristocrats she calls friends expecting him (Irish himself) to follow along. Tom has absolutely no idea what she's talking about, and it makes him realize how he doesn't fit in high society. It feeds into his arc of being lost and confused about his place in the world. When talking to Lord Grantham later, Tom clarifies that the Duchess was very polite and she tried her best to include him, he just feels that he isn't right for such inclusion.
• In Euphoria, Jules doesn't realize that Rue has a crush on her and thus doesn't realize how much it hurts Rue when she asks her to take racy pictures to send to "Tyler", her crush. On the other end of things, Rue doesn't realize how much it hurts Jules when she casts aspersions on "Tyler". It's one of the few times Rue and Jules argue.
• John Walker in The Falcon and the Winter Soldier means well, has respect for Sam and Bucky and genuinely wants to live up to Steve Roger's legacy but in his efforts to prove that, Walker ends up making several remarks that rub Sam and Bucky the wrong way, such as when Walker claims in an interview he and Steve were practically brothers, despite never meeting Steve.
• Feel Good:
  • Nick, who owns the club where Mae performs, uses cocaine in front of her frequently. He didn't realize she's a cocaine addict and tempts her obliviously each time.
  • Mae, after sleeping with Laura, says it was a mistake while dressing and disparages doing this without malice. Laura is not happy with this.
  • George's friend Binky thinks all queer women she meets have a crush on her, and casually uses slurs and otherwise hurtful language, all while completely oblivious to the fact that George is a closeted bisexual woman.
• Friends: When Joey's father comes to town he tries to make friendly small talk with the gang but keeps accidentally picking subjects they'd rather not talk about, such as asking after Ross' wife (who left him for another woman) or what happened to Phoebe's last boyfriend in front of her current one.
• In The Good Doctor, the titular character Shaun was an autistic savant who was skilled at treating patients, but because of his disorder his bedside manner needed some work which he actively strives towards improving. On one occasion when dealing with a trans woman patient he initially refused to acknowledge their dysphoria and continually referred to them as male (not helped by the fact that they had testicular cancer), which he later apologizes for. This is Played for Drama in the second season, as after he offends a mother by directly telling her that medication she took during pregnancy could've caused her child's illness Politically Incorrect Villain Dr. Han uses it as an excuse to transfer him.
• On Gotham a kidnapper and murderer targets the offspring of wealthy families. Young Bruce Wayne refuses to leave Gotham because he wants to see how the case unfolds and justifies himself on the basis of being an orphan. "Why would anyone take me? There's no one to take me from." Alfred looks wounded.
• Hell's Kitchen: In one season of the US version, Chef Ramsey unintentionally pissed off a contestant named Robert by calling him "Bobby", the name of his abusive scumbag of a father. After Robert explained the situation, Ramsey apologized for the mistake and promised not to use the nickname anymore.
• Hollyoaks: To help improve his magic obsessed and bullied nephew's confidence, Ethan begrudgingly agrees to let Mason saw him in half for a viral video, in hopes of impressing Mason's crush Ella. However while doing so, Ethan chooses to perform the trick shirtless to save face, so he can be Mason's "Sexy Assistant", which ultimately backfires, as while the trick is successful and the video does go viral, most of the comments reference just how good looking Ethan is, and less about Mason's showmanship, leading the poor kid to believe the video only went viral because of his hunky uncle. While Ethan assures him that's not the case, and that people like the video because Mason is a great magician, after pushing Mason to show the video to Ella to impress her, she can only comment on how buff Ethan is, while playfully joking she can't believe that he and the scrawny Mason are related, pushing the already confused boy deeper into a funk. This, coupled with his toxic "friendship" with extreme misogynist Eric, leads to Mason, jealous of Ethan's ease with women, and angry at Ella's "rejection" of him, joining a dangerous incel group, and making some very damaging choices.
• House of the Dragon: Alicent Hightower (Rhaenyra Targaryen's Best Friend) offhandedly comments that her birth was easy in front of Rhaenyra, whose mother died in a difficult birth.
• In the iCarly episode "iWin A Date", Carly does this when Gibby tells the group that a girl he has a crush on doesn't return his feelings.
  Carly: Poor kid. It must be hard to love someone who doesn't love you back.
  [Freddie gives her a longing stare]
  Carly: Sorry.
• Kel from Kenan & Kel is quite prone to this; unknowingly insulting people due to his general lack of thought. It gets worse after he Took a Level in Dumbass in the final two seasons. Here's one example:
  Kel: Uh, Mr. Rockmore, I mean, you and Mr. Malone went to the same school. I mean, why did he become more successful than you did?
  Sheryl: Kel!
  Kel: I mean, come on, he's a multi-millionaire with his own company and you're just... bald.
• Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Carisi was apparently raised in a pretty traditional, conservative household, and as such, he's not always in touch with some things, especially where LGBT issues are concerned. He also has all the tact of a trainwreck. However, he's still devoted to getting justice for victims, and it becomes obvious within a few conversations with him that he's not a bigot — he's just kind of clueless sometimes. One good example is when he admits to Rollins he doesn't understand what would make "a boy decide to be a girl," when the squad is helping a victim who is transgender. Rollins gently sets him straight, and Carisi gets what she's saying extremely quickly — and he at least had the good sense to not say such a thing in front of the victim. He also doesn't treat the victim any differently than he would have if she'd not been trans, either before or after the aforementioned discussion.
• In The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power, Elrond heads to see his old dwarf friend Durin, expecting to be welcomed warmly. He's thrown when he's at first refused and then Durin puts him through a rock-smashing challenge before he'll even talk to him. When Elrond expresses dismay at the treatment of his good friend, Durin snaps that Elrond hasn't so much as written a letter to him in twenty years and now marches in, expecting to be welcomed with open arms and handed anything he wants. He has to openly spell out that he's had a life with a family Elrond knows nothing about and that elves forget twenty years may be nothing for an immortal, but Durin is truly hurt at the idea Elrond had forgotten about him. Elrond is taken aback, deeply apologizing and after some grousing, Durin welcomes him to revive their friendship.
• M*A*S*H:
  • Aristocratic Major Charles Emerson Winchester perceives himself as more intelligent and refined than the rest of his fellow comrades, that sometimes he doesn't realize he offends people in doing so.
    Charles: Relax? Are you insane? How would you feel if your sister were marrying a swarthy, dark-haired, olive picker?
    Klinger: She did! And for your information, Major, so did my mother and my grandmother, not to mention the future Mrs. Max Klinger, whoever she is! [storms out in huff]
    Charles: Did I say something to offend him?
  • In the same episode, the following takes place with Father Mulcahy, who had counseled him to accept his sister's choice.
    Charles: The closest I can come to acceptance is to console myself with the thought that at least she's not marrying an Irishman.
    Mulcahy: [look of Tranquil Fury, then drops a loaded dinner tray on Charles' foot and also storms off in a huff]
    Charles: Why is everyone so testy?
• Arthur from Merlin is prone to this in earlier seasons towards the poor. Best demonstrated in "The Once and Future Queen", where he's staying with Gwen, a maidservant from the castle. He offers to cook her dinner and then cheats out on it the first chance he gets. She finds out and confronts him about it. This exchange happens.
  Arthur: Look, I can kill a chicken from a thousand paces, just don't ask me to cook it. That's what servants are for.
  [Gwen gives him a death glare]
  Arthur: [realizes what he said] I didn't mean.
• Mindhunter: Dr. Wendy Carr is a closeted lesbian, and both Gregg and Bill say some very homophobic thing in conversation with her. Holden makes a speech at his old boss' retirement party the boss doesn't take well, because he has actually been forced to retire to take the fall for Holden. Early on, Bill and Holden also offend a veteran detective when talking about Charles Manson.
• Monk. His Hyper-Awareness lets him in on all sorts of details about people, and he's not always clear on which ones are better to keep to himself, such as when he sees the date on a woman's credit card and realizes she's lying about her age or deduces that the judge at a hearing has been having an affair with his secretary.
• Mr. Pither from Monty Python's Flying Circus (he's on a cycling tour of North Cornwall). He's a perfectly kindly soul, but oblivious to other people's feelings.
• The Murders: Kate dislikes how her white mom upholds her as her biracial cop daughter while campaigning for mayor, or discussing her and Kate's dad being black people in the police force. She realizes her mom does mean well however.
• The Office (US):
  • Michael Scott. Even when his intentions are good, he doesn't realize how much the things he's saying can be rude or potentially offensive. Unless it involves Toby. Then he will completely deliberate about it.
  • Dwight Schrute casually and without malice insults people who fall short of his standards of efficiency and skill, which is nearly everyone. His coworkers generally blow it off.
• In The Orville Isaac, based on Data detailed below, is an android possessing no emotion or empathy and often says things that upset his crewmates without understanding why. In later seasons he becomes slightly more aware but still rude by most standards, although by that point people understand there's no malice. It doesn't help that he is objectively superior in almost every way to everyone else on the ship, and has no problem just stating that out loud.
• Rimmer from Red Dwarf is a more obnoxious variant — yes, he's a pain in the neck, but most times he thinks he's genuinely doing the right thing. Even if he does have Manipulative Bastard moments. Cat's a more straightforward example. Actually, you could just shove everyone in this category, they all have their moments.
• Queen Sugar:
  • Calvin's daughter Courtney tries to be an ally to the Black community but repeatedly puts her foot in her mouth, which causes her to worry that she's actually a bad person. However, Nova assures Courtney that her heart is clearly in the right place; she just needs to educate and improve herself.
  • At Darla's baby shower, she and Charley bond over their similar experiences being pregnant. Then they notice that Violet, who never had biological kids before reaching menopause, looks uncomfortable and they feel awful for upsetting her.
• Also Sherlock from BBC's Sherlock. He tends to deduce things and think he's being kind by letting the concerned parties know: telling Molly that Jim (her boyfriend) is gay, informing Mrs. Hudson that her love interest is married and a casanova, deducing presents people give him when he's hardly touched the package, etc. He eventually begins to rely on John to give him a heads-up when he's gone too far.
  Sherlock: [after asking why a woman would continue being upset about her daughter's stillbirth a decade ago] Ah... Not good?
  John: Bit not good, yeah.
• Schitt's Creek: Lots of characters do this occasionally, but a few do it all the time.
  • In Season 1, Twyla's tendency to do it is a source of tension between her and Mutt.
  • Alexis does this quite often, especially with Ted, not realizing she's insulted him or has forgotten their plans.
  • Moira's self-centered grousing about the town ends up hurting not only Jocelyn a few times but in one case a group of townspeople protest her remarks.
  • David does this to Stevie a few times, especially when he's desperate to get out of town in early seasons.
• Stargate SG-1, SG-1 finds a planet where a man from Earth, Ernest, has been stranded for 50 years. He shows them a computer that contains writing, with an alphabet based on the table of the elements. Daniel practically has a joygasm at the idea of translating a language written in elements.
  Ernest: I tried to read it. I tried to understand, but...
  Daniel: A hundred and forty-six elements, letters, or word symbols. If they're letters, if they're pictographic... I mean... this could take a lifetime.
  Ernest: [sadly] More...
  Daniel: [sheepish] Oh Sorry...
• Star Trek:
  • Star Trek: The Next Generation:
    • In "Transfigurations", Geordi asks Worf for some advice about how to woo Christy Henshaw. Worf tells Geordi "You must let her see the fire in your eyes.". He tells this to a man whose eyes are completely covered by a VISOR at all times. Geordi does a Double Take at Worf before shaking his head.
    • Data, being an android, is often insulting without meaning to be. In "Liaisons", he gives Worf advice on dealing with a fractious diplomat who's visiting the Enterprise:
      Data: I have heard that in moments of diplomatic tension, it is often helpful to find elements of commonality.
      Worf: Ambassador Byleth is demanding, temperamental, and rude!
      Data: [sincerely trying to be helpful] You share all of those qualities in abundance! Perhaps you should try to build on your similarities.
  • The Establishing Character Moment for Dr. Bashir in Star Trek: Deep Space Nine show him as an Upper-Class Twit who gushes about "adventure" and practicing "frontier medicine" to members of an ancient and proud civilization emerging from decades of brutal occupation.
    Bashir: I didn't want some cushy job or a research grant; I wanted this — the furthest reaches of the galaxy, one of the most remote outposts available. This is where the adventure is. This is where heroes are made. Right here — in the wilderness.
    Kira: This "wilderness" is my home.
• Castiel from Supernatural is particularly prone to the trope. He called Sam an "abomination" in order to explain a point, and complimented Dean by telling him, "you're not the broken shell of a man that I thought you were."
• Tokyo Vice:
  • When the Meicho editors ask Jake about what he thinks of Greedy Jew stereotypes, they seem to genuinely want to know his opinion and don't realize how insulting he could find the question.
  • When one of Katagiri's daughters answers the door to see Jake, she screams in fright and accuses him of being an ogre. He's apparently the first white man she's ever seen. Later, she draws a picture of him with a demonic, red head even though she's no longer afraid of him.
• The Twilight Zone (1959): Mr. Bemis, the Bookworm who loses his glasses in the apocalypse. While his fate wasn't kind, his obsession with books meant he neglected everybody around him, like a customer he was supposed to be assisting. It's a small wonder that his boss and wife were exasperated with him.
• In The Untamed, when a depressed Wei Wuxian told his sister Jiang Yanli that the massacre of Lotus Pier was all his fault, Jiang Yanli broke down and said that blaming anyone won't change or help anything. While she had good intentions for saying this and was too emotionally distraught to say anything else, the lack of assurance that Wei Wuxian wasn't blamed worsened his guilt over the incident, leading him to take drastic actions to sacrifice his golden core to give to Jiang Cheng.
• The Wheel of Time gives us the first meeting between Elayne Trakand, Daughter-Heir of Andor, raised in luxury as crown princess of one of the biggest and wealthiest countries on the planet, and Egwene al'Vere, a peasant-born novice and her next-door neighbour in the White Tower. Elayne, not realising she is looking at every material possession Egwene has in the world, questions why her room is "full of rubbish"... and then instantly realises her mistake and tries to recover by complimenting the craftsmanship of a blanket (which Egwene probably made herself). It's a good introduction to her character.
• The Wilds:
  • In season one when Toni rants to Fatin, Fatin casually asks, "Are you an Aries?", making Toni even more irritated.
  • In season two when things continue to go wrong for the girls, Fatin remarks to Martha that she feels like they've pissed off some gods and joking suggests sacrificing a virgin, before adding that she wouldn't be a candidate. Martha, who has been sexually abused and is often assumed to be the innocent one of the girls, gets offended and upset by the perceived implication that she would be a candidate.
• Yellowjackets: In 2021, Shauna and her husband attend a brunch with the parents of her best friend, who died during the events of 1996. The mother repeatedly pays tribute to her late daughter by talking about how much more beautiful, intelligent and talented she was than any of her classmates. She goes on to express sympathy for how Shauna must have felt living in her shadow. Shauna, who was accepted to Brown herself, just eats the abuse silently, but her husband is finally moved to call it out.
• Young Sheldon: In "A Virus, Heartbreak and a World of Possibilities", Sheldon inadvertently makes Billy sad because his announcing that he lost the computer files and can't get them back made Billy realize that his parents aren't getting back together. In voice over, adult Sheldon confesses that he wished he had apologized to Billy.

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