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Accidental Innuendos in Real Life.

  • The hardware of the Atari Jaguar combined with the CD add-on made the system end up looking like a toilet. Considering the console's drawbacks, it wasn't far off.
  • There's an online shop based in China that primarily sells clothing and electronics. Its name? Banggood.
  • Puns have been endemic to Bartolo Colon's career.
  • Cake Wrecks has a "Do You See What I See?" category precisely for unintentionally sexual and/or fecal-looking cakes.
  • When Walt Disney was making sure the Carousel of Progress was ready for its premiere at the 1964-1965 New York World's Fair, Alice Davis (Marc Davis' wife) was doing the costume work while simultaneously running the rotating theater. However, while putting the pants on the animatronic "John/Father". Alice was on her hands and knees near the animatronic's lap, trying to reach behind it snap the pants closed behind it. However, she was unaware that the curtain had opened up at that exact moment. This resulted in Alice hearing Walt roaring in the audience, since it looked like she was performing a very adult act while John/Father exclaimed "Very hot for July!". Completely embarrassed, she ran off stage, but Walt later reassured her by telling her "That was the funniest damn thing I've seen in a while!". Alice Davis would occasionally tell this amusing story to a handful of the folks at Disney in the later years of her life.
  • The US Government's new job plan being referred to as 'Cash for Caulkers'. Say it aloud, or watch Jon Stewart make it painfully obvious.
  • This post from the website "Rapture Ready": "I don't want to be lukewarm! How do I become hot for God?" (A large proportion of the posts on Rapture Ready consist of accidental innuendo. They never notice.)
    • A tradition that goes back at least to Hildegard von Bingen, whose encounters with Jesus sometimes read more like an encounter with a vibrator.
  • One Australian corporation, based around the Coffs Harbour Ex-Services Club, has adopted the name "the CEX group". And lo, there was much sniggering.
    • There's also a second-hand electronic entertainment retail chain in the UK called CeX. Which often have bright-red shop fronts.
  • There was a Chinese restaurant in Franklin, Tennessee called China Wang (pronounced Wong). However, they've since changed their name. Perhaps they caught up on it.
  • If you're ever in a stage crew or some other thing involving a lot of building, you will see this. Especially in middle and high school crews. This is mainly due to how often the words screw, drill, and hole are used.
  • Do a search on YouTube for "Gym Idiots" or "Gym Fails", and many videos will contain people's attempt of workouts which often result in some rather funny poses and/or movements.
  • The Columbus Blue Jackets revealed a new, secondary team mascot along with their new third jerseys in November 2010. The mascot, Boomer (a person in an inflatable suit shaped like a cannon), was intended to be geared toward younger fans, specifically early elementary age, 8 and younger. Unfortunately, nobody in the Jackets' marketing department could see how this would be a problem. It might've helped if they'd considered focus group testing that went beyond just the 8-and-under crowd. It also doesn't help that Boomer is a tie-in with the club's third jersey - which the team opted not to wear for its scheduled fifth appearance, after losing their first four games in them, even leading to the team taking the third-jersey schedule off their website.note 
  • This has been making the rounds for a (long) while, but the town of Cumming, Georgia has a Cumming First United Methodist Church. Their website was originally located at www.cummingfirst.com (and included a subpage describing their organ), until they realized that the Internet is an utterly merciless place. Subsequently it moved to www.cummingfirstmethodist.com, and it would appear that it is now in the midst of a move to the (finally relatively innuendo-free) www.cfumcga.com. Unfortunately, another church in the same town is known as "First Baptist Cumming". Lagrange, NY had an elementary school named after it.
  • The mineral Cummingtonite is actually named after a town in the Berkshire Hills of Massachusetts. There's also Arsole. The name is related to arsenic. (That Other Wiki notes that some find the name "silly" in a disapproving settle-down-class manner.)
  • There was a professional engineering company that plastered its name on massive signs around southern Ontario: "Cumming Cockburn". They've thankfully (or sadly) rebranded as the IBI Group.
  • Canadian musician Bruce Cockburn (pronounced "Co-burn") attracts some snickers, especially for the song "If I Had a Rocket Launcher" .
  • Australian Rugby Union player Digby Ioane's comment about English players caused some giggles:
    Ioane: They are pretty wingers, they are really good looking and I just can't wait to go against them.
  • "Nothing sucks like an Electrolux." The Darwin Awards demonstrate that testing this is a bad move.
  • Fucking (pronounced "Fooking"), a small village in Austria mostly famous for having its road signs commonly stolen as souvenirs. Eventually the villagers, fed up with this, changed the town's name to "Fugging".
  • Georgia O Keefe's flower paintings. Though the flowers are essentially plant sex organs (or contain them at least), so it isn't innuendo at all...they are paintings of genitalia.
  • The English nursery rhyme "I Love Little Pussy" has become rather controversial in modern times. (It actually ends with "Pussy and I very gently will play.") The same goes for the nursery rhyme that starts, "Ding dong dell/The pussy's in the well..."
  • The vanity licence plate "ILVTOFU" was turned down by a local DMV. It was a vegan's expression for liking tofu.
  • The German TV news anchorman Jens Riewa had a problem with a Teleprompter. Because of that, during broadcast, he pushed a button on the underside on his desk. For the viewers, it looked like he was touching his crotch. Afterwards, he explained "I experienced trouble with my .... device". The clip of this scene became quite popular after it was picked up by a comedian, because of its accidental innuendo.
  • Similarly, the anchors on the Australian Today show discuss what they use for home defense after one brings up the "long, stabby thing" he keeps next to his bed. Cue one of the women stating that her husband is her "long, stabby thing" without ever realizing she ran afoul of this trope. The other male anchor mentions that he dislikes the idea of stabbing an intruder, stating that he'd "prefer whackin' 'em off from a distance" - though he immediately realized his mistake.
  • Joe Biden on cheerleaders. Look at that line again.
  • Judy Blume's Fudge Box Set.
  • This billboard advertising McDonald's' Shrek themed McFlurries.
  • From the New York Times dining section: "The Domaine de Chevalier 2007, still in oak barrels, trumpets its presence with an explosive burst of pure sauvignon blanc fruit and a beautifully opaque texture that invites repeated sips in an effort to penetrate the wine's mystery. The 2006, not yet bottled, is rounder and less flamboyant..." Trumpets its presence with an explosive burst? Invites repeated sips in an effort to penetrate its mystery? Is this wine having an orgasm or something?
  • Several anecdotes on Not Always Right see people wander into this: "It was a pretty big rack."
  • One of the desserts at Outback Steakhouse, an ice cream-covered brownie, is called "Chocolate Thunder from Down Under".
  • Pitching great Randy Johnson, whose name is Randy Johnson. Even better, his nickname is "The Big Unit". One wonders if he wears his Porn Stache ironically.
    • It's not as bad as Melvin Upton Jr., who is more famously known as BJ note  but has been making efforts to move back to his given name.
  • The Shake Weight. South Park picked up on this one with a vengeance.
    • This requires visuals. How any of those women did that with a straight face....
    • Done even worse for the Men.
    "Oh, that's it"
  • Shout Color Catcher slogan: "The Proof is on the Sheet."
  • Seattle has a streetcar that was once called South Lake Union Transit, but was then renamed. That has not deterred locals from making jokes about "riding it."
  • S&M Moving Systems.
    • There's also a Chinese knockoff of M&M's candy called S&M's.
  • Sir Terry Wogan exemplified this trope — well, it was really Mick Sturbs (the author of the "Janet and John" stories) and many of his listeners who contributed in interesting letters who did, but Wogan encouraged it all. Every little bit of that survived his move from daily breakfast radio on BBC Radio 2, to what became his last radio work before his death, a weeky live show on Sunday afternoons.
  • One of the most successful brands of condoms is "Trojan". Now, you wouldn't expect a condom to have unintentionally dirty implications, but.... what the Trojans are most famous for was accepting into their impregnable fortress something that seemed harmless, which then proceeded to release hundreds of enemy agents. (The last part being particularly ironic considering the whole point of a condom is to prevent the user's "agents" from getting inside the person.)
    • Imagine that a high school needed a mascot, and settled on the Trojans. The yearbook and several other features were later changed to Troyan, whatever that's supposed to be. The teams' names stayed, though, and students are well aware of it. One year's school sweatshirt read "Now 99.7% effective."
    • Now imagine a different high school, whose mascot is also the "Trojans", unedited. The swim team's shirts say "Nothing swims past a Trojan."
    • Topeka, Kansas has "Seaman High School", which fits this trope well enough on its own, but was made better whenever their sports teams played Topeka High, who had the Trojans as their mascot. There is nothing accidental about the newspaper headlines that read "Seaman breaks through Trojan defenses" or "Trojans contain Seaman." Similarly dirty headlines can be constructed whenever the University of South Carolina (the Gamecocks, or Cocks for short) plays against either Troy or the University of Southern California, both of whom have the Trojans as their mascot. No doubt the subeditors have a field day if they ever meet the Oregon State Beavers.
      • This is probably why the Southern Cal women's basketball team prefers to be called the "Women of Troy", though they're missing out on a literary reference.
      • The best part? This is the City that the Westboro Baptists live in.
  • Uranus gets it bad enough to rate its own trope page.
  • There is a Washington Metro station called "Ballston." "Foggy Bottom" also tends to make out-of-towners smirk.note 
  • The major chain store Woolworths released a line of little girls' bedroom furniture entitled "Lolita". Not for long, though. If it had been anything other than a bedroom set they might have got away with it.
  • Nintendo of America CEO Reggie Fils-Amie's infamous and memetic line during a demo of Wii Fit at E3 2007: "My Body is Ready."
  • During the E3 2013 presentation for the Xbox One, a male gamer was playing Killer Instinct against a female gamer. When it was apparent that she was on the receiving end of a Curb-Stomp Battle, he quipped "just let it happen, it'll be over soon". What was meant to be a Badass Boast ended up sounding like a joke about rape, which didn't settle well with many viewers.
  • A chess game was played in the Liechtenstein Open of 1992, in which Hans-Uwe Kock played against Johannes Sucher. This is how "Kock-Sucher" was possible to be cited in a book on chess openings.
  • A fairly common reason for this are words that aren't quite Have a Gay Old Time, but still near it. Take the word 'taint', for instance: it is entirely possible, indeed even likely to only be aware of the contamination meaning, but as it so happens it is also a slang term for a part of the human body. The more innocent meaning is both at least equally valid and more widespread, but if you are aware of the slang term...
  • A family-friendly diner in Pennsylvania popular for its ice cream briefly had this sign over its napkin holder:
    "What do you cream? In case it's your shirt, please take some of these!"
  • Candle salad. As Teresa Nielsen Hayden once put it: You have to have a really clean mind to come up with something like this.
  • Bad time for unnecessary quotation marks: Please do not allow children to "bang" on piano -- thanks!
  • Hockey announcers often fall prey to the Accidental Innuendo, mainly due to sticks being used in the sport. References such as a player "having a long stick" and "stick-on-stick action" are common.
  • American football announcers have it at least as bad, what with the tight ends and wide receivers. And any sport that involves ball-handling. In fact, it might be best to just say sports announcers, full stop. There was a T-shirt covered in common American football announcing phrases that sound dirty but aren't, which included sayings like "All he has to do is keep pounding it up the middle!" and "He could...go...all...the...way!!!"
  • Baseball gives us the phrase "get good wood on the ball".
    • And of course, as mentioned on one of George Carlin's early albums: "The batter's got two balls on him."
    • And then there's the old joke about a foreigner (usually a Scotsman) watching his first baseball game, ending with his reaction to being told that the batter had four balls...
  • Cricket is also a frequent source of accidental innuendo. At an England-West Indies Test match at the Oval in 1991, Jonathan Agnew said of Ian Botham being declared out after clipping the bails of the wicket as he tried to vault over them that "He just didn't quite get his leg over."note  When he realised what he had said, he dissolved into hysterics, dragging fellow commentator Brian Johnston down with him despite the latter's efforts to maintain his composure.note 
    • The same commentator also described the scene during the lunch interval during a test match, pointing out that in front of the commentary box some children were playing an impromptu game of cricket, with the phrase "Just in front of us are some small boys playing with their balls."
    • Another incident involved a player trying to replace the rubber grip on the handle of his bat: "He's trying to get his rubber on - he can't quite get it over the shaft." Cue more uncontrolled laughter.
    • In the days of radio commentators Blowers and Johnstonenote , the names of two players gifted a (possibly) deliberate innuendo, delivered with complete deadpan panache:
    The batsman's Holding, the bowler's Willey.
  • The word innuendo itself, consider it's pronounced, "in-you-end-o".
  • Soviet bloc countries had lots of jokes based upon the Party's Newspeak: what is the greatest achievement of transplantology? To move the member from the Party's arm to the head note  Also, the Polish version of the joke uses phrases z ramienia (literally: "from the arm", but it could also means "from an organization") and wysuwa się na czoło ("rising to the forehead", but also "take a lead"). Therefore, the sentence could mean that a party member is rising to the power or... some Body Horror is happening. Oh, and "suspended member" (zawieszony członek) could also be taken the wrong way. Many newspapers have fun with that.
  • There's a currency, a people, and a language called "dong". Cracked had fun with this.
  • There was this classic headline about a Brazilian soccer player going to Portugal: Argel Fuks Off To Benfica
  • The slightly goofy, Swedish furniture names of IKEA products have been noted as having this property from time to time. "Diktad" means "made up" or "poetical", but it does make you snigger. Unfortunately, one of their products, a bed, did end up with a name that meant something rather close to "good fuck" in German. Oops.
    • There's also a piece of IKEA furniture known as "Beslut". That's Swedish for "decision", but it has quite different connotations in English.
    • And an armchair whose name loosely sounds like "butt-tight" (Poäng) in German.
    • And the Fartful!
    • The Fräck mirror might qualify... unless you're the new Battlestar Galactica in which case it's a deliberate inside joke.
  • The word wang actually means money in the Malay language. And then there's duit (pronounced do-it), which also more or less means the same thing. There are nasty adult jokes that plays on these. Doesn't help that the word money sound similar to another Malay word mani, which means sperm cum. There's also the phrase money shot that is another word for Bukkake.
  • There’s actually a company in Malaysia called Sumurwang PLC.. Who wants some more Wang? Them, apparently.
  • The 11 Funniest Unintentionally-Sexual Signs Of All Time.
  • This forum has a list of some of the best ones on British TV and Radio.
  • A legendary German classic, said by sport reporter Heinz Maegerlein on a ski event 1959: "Tausende standen an den Hängen und Pisten". note  However, "Pisten" is a homophone to "pissten" note  - and even worse, both interpretations are grammatically correct.
  • Wagner's Meat Market of New Orleans has a rather... interesting slogan.
  • The behaviorist term "self stimulating behavior". It is no euphemism for masturbation. People generally shorten it to "stim" or "stimming".
  • Faker (pronounced exactly like fucker) is a normal last name in Arabic and Persian, meaning "great thinker". When written in English on your passport however ... especially since some people who don't know enough English (be it the person with the name or the one in charge of writing the English version of the name on the passport) even spell it as Fucker. There is an (unfortunate) cleric in Iran whose name was misspelled as Fucker in some sources causing him to become the butt of many jokes for years (ironically he was the cultural emissary of Iran to Europe at the time).
    • There is also a small city in Iran called Fuck (with that exact spelling on the road signs). It's because the ones writing the signs were idiots but ...
  • Even the dust dry area of mathematics contains some stuff that is pure Heh Heh, You Said "X" material: Coxeter group (and its Tits boundary), Pumping Lemma, P-Space hard, Cuntz algebra, Hairy Ball theorem...Enough!! See "Rude math :-)" for an exhaustive list...Also there's an SMBC comic that points out that, referring to math terms, sexation is repeated penetration.
  • There's a B'jaysville Lane in Iowa City. Presumably they didn't have enough room on the sign for "Bluejaysville."
  • Words such as screw, drill, hole, nuts, caulk, jack, stripper, grinder, piledriver, butt joint and so on have very different meanings outside of the construction field.
  • Being a German chemist and reading about "Fick's Diffusionsgesetz" (that would be roughly equivalent to the fucking diffusion law) is completely normal, and if you seen it often enough, you even don't snicker anymore. But reading ten minutes later about the necrolog of Prof. Kleinpoppen (that would be smallshagging) makes you think if there actually is a Cosmic Giggle Factor.
  • "Clinton Licks Beavers". Though the headline sounds like it's related to Bill Clinton's sex scandal, this Clinton is a high school in a Tennessee town of the same name, and the Beavers were the mascot of their rival school.
  • In this interview with Bette Davis, she makes some rather choice words about losing her virginity.
    Bette: If you want to come to Connecticut in front of the fire some night, I'll tell you about my wedding night. You'll be on the floor for three hours.
    Beat as she realises what she's just said. The live audience giggles.
    Bette: No! I did not mean that. No! I meant laughing on the floor.
  • One Gratuitous English door sign says "During the work, prohibition against penetration". Another says "Erection in progress", along with displaying a man sillhouette with his private area x-ed out.
  • A Chinglish/Engrish retail shelf sign reads "Please don't touch yourself, let us help you to try out".
  • Probably an intentional That Came Out Wrong but the 2017 OCR note  Chemistry test (A required exam for 16-year olds in the UK), contained the phrase "Chris tests the flexibility of different shafts". The question was related to the shaft of a golf club.note  Reportedly, sniggering could be heard in exam rooms across the country.
  • A banner ad for The Mummy (2017) appeared during a Toronto Blue Jays baseball game being simulcast by MLB Network from the Jays' broadcaster, but a New Content Countdown Clock for a Chicago Cubs game on the latter covered up the "M" with humorous results.
  • The Federal Unemployment Tax Act, also known as "FUTA", is a little hard to study for those who enjoy hentai, due to "futa" also being short for futanari.
  • Former Utah State Senator Chris Buttars, who was a very vocal opponent of gay rights, claimed in an interview that "I don't mind gays. I just don't want 'em stuffin' it down my throat all the time."
  • South Dakota started a billboard campaign to warn people of the dangers of violently turning the steering wheel in snowy/icy conditions. The motto? Don't jerk and drive. As the article shows, it set up a lot of jokes, even when they "yanked" the campaign.
    • South Dakota was at it again in early 2020 with their "Meth: We're on it" campaign
  • Due to his name, this happens all the time with MMA artist "Danny Mianus". The most famous lines spoken by announcers: "Mianus is bleeding all over", "This is a lot of pain for Mianus", "Looks like Mianus could be in trouble", "Mianus is relaxed here", "I watch mi anus", "some physician just popped in here to look at mianus", "can semen get inside Mianus?", "this is not where Mianus wants to be" and "Mianus needs to losen up a little here"
  • For whatever reason, a fair number of people (presumably due to being unfamiliar with Twitter) pronounce "# (whatever)" as "pound (whatever)" instead of "hashtag (whatever)". This has led to several people (including internet personalities, who should really know better) calling #Metoo "pound Metoo", which is doubly unfortunate considering it's a hashtag about women who have been sexually assaulted or raped..
  • "Anguished English" (a book about funny language mistakes) has the following line (reportedly written by a student) "At the end of "The Awakening", Edna thinks only of herself. Her suicide is selfish because she leaves all who care about her behind."
  • In C++, most of the language's standard library is in the "std" (short for standard) namespace. Accessing any part of the library usually means prefixing it with "std", making most C++ code repeatedly feature these initials. It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "dirty code."
  • In 2019, Wolves’ muscular footballer Wilfred Boly got the rather unfortunate tweet praising him “We all (heart symbol) Big Willy”.
  • In German, the terms for the genitals are so generic that they can pop up anywhere - "Glied" (penis) can refer to any functional part, while "Scheide" (vagina) to any separator, such as sheath of a sword. You can only imagine the fun a translator has when a sword is of the Talking Weapon variety. Especially if the book is for kids and the sword refers to females of his species...
  • The Calgary White Hat Oath has one, in which the oathtaker(s) mention(s) "having pleasured [themselves]". At least a few oathtakers who took the oath on Stampede City Sessions have lampshaded this.
  • One article discussing negative reviews of Freddy Got Fingered went by the headline of "Green gets fingered for Razzies". In other words, it's a typical movie critic Pun that ended up sounding wrong.
  • A common Chinese menu item is "Dry Fried Ass(donkey) Meat".
  • On November 11, 2020, political commentator Dinesh D'Souza tweeted "Ted Cruz just UNLOADED on McCabe's face over the ridiculous Logan Act double standard with Biden vs. Flynn." Naturally, Twitter had a field day with this.
  • Skyscrapers are frequently derided as phallic symbols (never mind that they're designed to maximize the usable space/ground area ratio, and building them tall and thin is the only practical way to accomplish this). New York State governor Andrew Cuomo didn't do much to dispel this perception when, in April 2021, he announced plans to erect a 1,200ft building at 15 Penn Street called... Penn 15. The timing of the announcement led more than a few people to suspect that the name was an April Fool joke. It wasn't.
  • "Embiid is so good man. His D is incredible. He has length. He has girth. He can penetrate. He can pound you in the paint. He can shoot it all over the floor." If you think this tweet is about anything other than basketball player Joel Embiid's performance on the court, get your filthy mind out of the gutter.
  • The emergency exit map for the Marriott Marquis hotel in San Diego, CA uncannily resembles the female genitalia.

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