Let's Watch: Panty and Stocking With Garterbelt!

Because why the hell not?

Going in blind. All I know of the first episode is something about sugar, sex, and a shit monster.

y/n on whether or not I should continue?

edited 3rd Oct '10 3:09:53 PM by Chubert

Yes, DO IT! It would be Funny as hell!

Oh boy. This should be interesting.

Do it.

edited 3rd Oct '10 3:16:44 PM by Gilphon

Episode 1: Excretion Without Honor or Humanity and Death Race 2010

Ok, first thing you notice is the really gratuitous English. The OP begins and the sound effects, the lyrics…all English. I cannot discern what the lyrics are. It sounds like…three words over and over again. Panty, Stocking…somethingoranother.

There’s a cheesy title shouted out by kids. “Excretion Without Honor or Humanity.” Uh, Shout-Out to Kill Bill soundtrack?

And it’s…exposition time! Seems like a classic Monster of the Week scenario- our heroes reside in Daten City, which is constantly plagued by “Ghosts.” Or heroes are the angels, “Panty,” and “Stocking.”

We zoom in on the HQ of these noble warriors and we get…Gir? The fuck?

A black man…falls from the sky, bringing with him a slip of paper with the words “W.C” on-what is this? Isn’t that only used in the U.K?

We totally need someone with a British accent in this show. And even if it's used all across Japan, we still need a man with a British accent.

An alarm sounds, and we see our two main characters, one of which has obviously just had sex. It’s Panty. So much for Moral Guardians.

…I’m not entirely certain I want to entrust the fate of a city in these people’s hands, though that may well be the point. In any case, we have the “quirks” of the main characters be explained- Panty is obsessed with sex, Stocking is obsessed with sugar. Easy enough to remember.

And we are given one of the most ridiculous Exposition Dumps ever. Our monster of the week is a…toilet monster, abducting you by your fecal matter.

A ridiculous expo scene only matched by the ridiculous followup, in which Panty talks about morning wood. Uh, after I finish writing this, I’m going over the number of times I use the word “ridiculous.” Three spins and…what? What? What is this?

Ok, Heaven Coins are explained. Shit that falls from the sky when you kill a ghost. Looks like that’s our MacGuffin.

And now we see…holy shit, ok, we see Chuck’s name, and we see him get splattered against a wall. This is what happens when you write in real time.

Oh, goody, Split Screen dialogue. We see Panty and Stocking take off to combat the evil shit monster in their pimping car, with little to no regard for traffic safety.

And the car’s name is See Through. No, you did not read that wrong, the car has a fucking name, and it is See Through.

After this, we cut to the aftermath of a porn scene. Again, I am not joking. There’s a plumber being complimented by a lady, who extols his “skills with hands.” Uh, yeah. That’s totally a porno scene.

Panty and Stocking have their Dynamic Entry. The plumber is suspected of being a ghost. Clint Eastwood rolls over in his grave. (Being Bad Ass. You’re doing it wrong, Panty.) It seems that Panty’s gun is useless against normal humans, as is revealed when the glowing bullets are as pinballs against the plumber’s skull. Panty and Stocking realize that the plumber is not the ghost, and depart.

We cut to a sex scene. It’s…Panty and the plumber. Specifically, we see the plumber orgasm. Stocking comments on Panty’s sex drive. Garterbelt is an Unfunny to end them all.

Uh, black jokes regarding curry…waiting for the plot to pick up again…

…Panty goes to take a shit. I…wow, seriously, they have constipated expressions. And sound effects. Holy fucking shit what is this?

Panty is being eaten by the toilet.

Panty was eaten by a toilet.

We have a fight scene going on inside the toilet, after which, the toilet regurgitates a metric fuckton of shit and Panty covered in a second metric fuckton of shit. We have Stocking and Garterbelt enter, with a fairly standard “It stinks” gag going on.

We then cut to the city, with…shit geysers…turning into a…shit monster. In this world, vomit is apparently pink. Garterbelt is apparently a reverend. Police are useless. The monster is apparently a plumber killed by, you guessed it, shit. We have Panty covered in, again, shit. Flies are circling around shit.

Transformation sequence, art shift…wasn’t Panty just covered by shit? Beauty Is Never Tarnished, I guess. Or somebody had a hose.

I am slowly beginning to realize that this is a pole dance Transformation Sequence. I also learn that Panty ACTUALLY DOES TAKE OFF HER PANTIES TO MAKE THAT GUN.

This show seems to have a penchant for songs that have only three words in them. “Fly away now,” playing during the Transformation Sequence, “Panty Stocking somethingsomethingsomething” in the OP…

After the transformation sequence, we get some fairly standard shoot, slice, and dice. It seems that the first Monster of the Week was defeated. And yet the episode is only half over.

Hm, it seems as if the episodes each contain two arcs. We now begin Death Race 2010.

OH GOD THE LSD SEQUENCE IT’S TOO MUCH.

We see Panty and her new manwhore. He came too fast. We cut to a counter of the manwhore’s orgasm count-OH GOD THAT’S FAR TOO MANY ORGASMS. NO…NONONO. The penis does not work that way.

Empty sports car, work of a ghost, and here is our new Monster of the Week.

It’s the Venom car, racing through the streets of Daten City. Car chase through a mall, etc. etc. I can only guess that the demon is the work of a guy who came too fast. Either that, or it was actually a racer, but that would be sane, and we can’t have that.

In the ensuing fight, the demon car gets Panty’s panties stuck on his head, manages to totally fuck up the army of police cars (who are now the official Red Shirt Army), and drive away.

And we have a barricade. AND HOLY SHIT THE POLICE MANAGED TO ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING!

Oh, wait, no they didn’t, the demon car just jacked a truck.

Guns Akimbo galore as we try to bring down the demon truck. Conventional weapons actually seem to have some effect when wielded by a major character.

Stocking, who hasn’t really done much but slice things up, slices more things up. That’s pretty much it. She’s the goth that slices things up, Panty’s the whore (too offensive?) promiscuous individual nah, fuck it, whore that shoots things up. The truck seems to be defeated…

…Oh, it’s a demon fucking train.

Uh, Panty’s vagina gets broadcast on live television, as Panty’s panties are still on the demon train. This is not an implication, this is explicit. We’re trying to find Panty’s panties now. The train, it appears, has just orgasmed.

Holy shit, Chuck’s a goddamn rubber band.

And here comes the inevitable “came too early” joke. Demon train’s ass gets blown up by Panty (again.) When does the goth get to do anything?

Wow, they actually show live explosions when the demons get their asses kicked. It seems fairly stock as well.

And remember kids, technique is more important than speed. The moral of our story. So if you have a small dick, don’t worry, watching lots of porn to find out what pleases a women is the way to go.

And we never did get to find out how that car came to be.

ED?! COULD THERE BE JAPANESE LYRICS?!

Or just techno music.

Nope, techno music and English lyrics. And more than three words!

This…I really don’t know what the fuck to say. It’s pretty shitty, when you think about it. Like High School Of The Dead, but with a Hirano that just doesn’t cut it, a Saeko that doesn’t win any fights, and ‘’way’’ too many sex jokes. But…it’s still a total WHAT THE FUCK sort of series. Whether or not that’s good- well, to the show’s credit, it’s well animated WHAT THE FUCK. And the WHAT THE FUCK level can only go up from the first episode…or not. We’ll see.

The basic gist of this liveblog was written while the episode was watched, but I go back through it to make things more clear.

edited 9th Oct '10 8:31:34 PM by Chubert

W. C. (or Water Closet) is used all over in japan. (the fact that the world cup and water closet have the same initials was a major plot point in a Detective Conan ep.)

I think for all the "WTF JAPAN!" that this shw is going to generate it's actually seems havily influenced by american cartoons. So it's "WTF USA!"...

Indeed. Most of the WTF seems to be generated from bizarre attempts to use American-ish toilet humor, as opposed to Japan-WTF. We have english lyrics, SFX, etc...

It was intentional from the start, perhaps. Maybe later there will be a mixture of the two in a later episode?

Guess what Chubert?

Well, here goes Episode 2.

Um…still can’t make out the lyrics. Cherry…baby…feel alright? Why not.

This arc’s title is “The Clamor of the Beehive.”

…stock animation, much? Yeah, they totally used the exact same animation for the opening sequence. The narration is different though. Now, it’s talking about school. Is this going to be an arc set in highschool?

Garterbelt wakes Panty and Stocking up (god damn, I cannot stand their complaining at being woken up.)

Ok, new monster, new client who is the principle of Daten City High…it’s going to be a highschool arc. Uh, are they going to make Panty bang high schoolers? I hope that I won’t have to refer to the preceding sentence later in this liveblog.

Students are going missing. Fairly standard. Police are “completely baffled,” which isn’t much of a surprise. Yeah, it’s a ghost.

Uh, the principle clasps onto Stocking’s knees, and gets kicked aside for his efforts. And then Gir Chuck begins dry-humping him. Pleasant.

We cut to Daten City High and…wow, this is totally an American high school. This is certainly a very American-oriented anime. Guys begin fawning over our heroines. Panty and Stocking have a conversation how Panty never went to Angel class (or something like that.) Uh…a guy covered by bees comes running through the hallways, and gets….shot at. He falls to the ground, and is treated to a nice view of Panty.

Panty kicks an orange bag the kid was carrying back onto the kid’s head…and he’s promptly covered by bees again. Running away, he runs into a massive wall of a man—a football player. Who’s carrying a girl, along with some other football players, on their shoulders. Yeah, we have our Libby.

The Libby’s name is Barbie. Uh, fairly standard Libby dialogue. “The school belongs to me, don’t disobey me, etc. etc.”

Well, in order to “catch” the Ghost, they’re going by one of the least effectual means possible: infiltration. This is pretty much a massive excuse so that Panty and Stocking can attend highschool. We have a montage of Panty and Stocking fucking around with Barbie. I must admit, the animation is growing on me.

The montage sequence, however, not so much. It’s just Panty and Stocking…well, fucking around. Making Barbie look like an idiot by one-upping her in everything. I would expect this sort of thing from High School Musical, frankly, not Gainax.

So we have dialogue about nobody paying any attention to Barbie after Panty and Stocking arrived. While they talk about “crowning the new queen,” we cut to the inside of a locker and…they totally have Panty merch. Shout-Out to NGE merch, perhaps?

Panty seems to enjoy having herself be whored out by the merch. We cut to a sex ed class, with the standard dialogue—“don’t have sex, you will die, it doesn’t matter what position you –“ wait a minute what?

Well, at least they have the time-honored tradition of handing out condoms. Panty takes one, thinks that it’s gum, and blows a penis shaped bubble. Wow. This is ridiculously over the top.

“Geek Boy,” as the person covered by bees in the beginning is no called, comes to Panty and Stocking complaining that his friends have been kidnapped. We learn that he’s a follower of the occult, and has a “PKE meter” that, apparently, detects ghosts. It’s a tube-like device attached to his rather bulky backpack.

Who you gonna call…

They begin searching for ghosts, and find nothing. Panty, in a fit of frustration, hits the PKE meter. It goes wild, flashing red, before exploding. The scene reveals that…oh, whaddaya know, it’s Barby. Was anybody surprised by this?

Ok, so Barby’s the ghost. And all the cheerleaders and football players of the school appear to be mindless slave-drones. We get a fight scene with Panty and Stocking fighting the drones. Apparently, the helmets that the football players wear are actually smaller bees, which turn them into mindslaves.

And, finally, the ghost is defeated.

Ok, I’m just waiting for this arc to end.

Oh god, Panty moves in for the football players. MY GOD WHAT DID I SAY WHAT DID I SAY I DIDN’T WANT TO REFER TO THAT PREVIOUS SENTENCE.

• sigh.* Well, we have our Immodest Orgasm. Way to go, Gainax. Fucking A.

Sex and the Daten City is the new title. Is Gainax trying to get sued?

A fighter jet zooms over the city. A mummy like thing is terrorizing the streets. The jet rams into the mummy—revealed to be a ghost—as Panty and Stocking step out. Owait, it’s actually a movie trailer. Coming out this winter. Much Engrish is said.

…when did Panty become a model? Seriously, when? Apparently, she is now. She’s out there, signing shit, pimping shit, etc.

Well, there certainly is a lot of Panty merchandise going around. She has become a celebrity, apparently. And she is “winning the world over, from kids to the elderly” – No. Just... No.

“Without scandal?” Well, that’s what Panty is, apparently. Bullshit! We saw her vagina, like, seven times in the first episode!

Uh, now there’s some pointless banter between Panty and Stocking. They throw insults back and forth. That’s…pretty much it. All we learn is that Stocking can’t make commercials for shit. Stocking warns panty not to “cause any scandals.” Yeah, bullshit, now we know what happens at the end.

So, there’s a preview of Sex and the Daten City and…the director is…

David Shyalaman.

Wut.

Well, Panty gets pissed off at the announcer for saying that it’s her debut movie. It’s her second movie. Ooh, I can’t wait to see this.

The movie is totally a porno. I am facepalming as I type this.

The audience is horrified. Their mouths are sealed shut with money. The constant moaning that goes on in the background is rather annoying.

The black producer guy has a conversation with Panty. As it turns out, because her debut film was a porno, her celeb life is screwed.

Panty panics, and uses Chuck to destroy the evidence—at least, the evidence at hand. It was only one VCR. Stocking quickly sees the problem with this. There are hundreds of DVDs that probably have the porno out there. As Panty’s crew quickly runs away, she turns to Stocking for help.

Well, Stocking has apparently found a list of every single person in the entire world with that DVD. They go on a destruction spree.

We cut to an all-American family…after they leave, the wife isn’t happy. Now…now they start going cross-globe.

And the last DVD is in space. But Panty decides to keep the last one as a souvenir. She gives it to Stocking. We cut to the premier of the movie. And…as it turns out, Panty decided to cut Stocking from all of the scenes.

This will not end well.

We cut to Panty on “Youtobe.” Oh, goody. I can tell how this is going to turn out.

Last scene is of a guy, seeing the video, reaching for a box of tissues.

Well, that’s the end of that.

This show lives on Refuge in Vulgarity. If HSOTD was BLOOD TITS GORE ZOMBIES GUNS GTFO IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT, this is TITS SEX FART JOKES IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT GTFO.

And lots, and lots, of Engrish. The Engrish, the over-the-top sex jokes (it’s quite clearly going for humor, not Fanservice, so at least we know it’s intentional), the PPG-esque art style—three defining characteristics of this show.

edited 9th Oct '10 3:32:36 PM by Chubert

And I love this show more every episode.

What.

What the flying fuck.

^^ ^

Both entirely appropriate reactions.

I still can't decide how I feel about this show, the animation is a solid eight in my book but the writing is no better than a three.

Guess what Chubert? Its out!

And so, Episode 3 begins.

Gotta love how the personalities of the two main characters are pretty much explained in the OP. I mean, you see that Panty’s brains are full of sex, and Stocking’s brains are full of sweets. It’s Cliffnotes Characterization, except that’s actually all you need to know.

First arc is…Catfight Club.

We have our Stock Footage. The narration talks about the differences between siblings (wait, are Panty and Stocking siblings?) Anyways, we have the line “siblings are very intimate strangers.”

I’m sorry, is this going to be the Incest arc?

Ok, well, at least the following narration is about fighting, not sex.

We cut to a scene of Stocking. She’s rummaging through her room, shouting “missing” over and over. Apparently, her pudding is missing. Stocking is quick to accuse Panty of the theft. Panty is…pretty quick to admit to the crime. As she tries to defend herself with such classic lines as “it didn’t even taste that good” and “It’s not like we’re little kids here,” Stocking grows angrier and angrier. Whoop de do.

Stocking accuses Panty of being “irresponsible” (no shit, Sherlock). She points to their respective rooms (Stocking’s is classic Goth, Panty’s…wow, I don’t even know what to say), and notes the fact that Panty’s is a shithole. Uh, we also see examples of the toilet (wow, really? More toilet humor?) and the bathtub after Panty’s finished using them, as well as…examples of her after eating….and having sex…..

And now we get the line “are we really sisters?” You’re shitting me, right? They’re fucking sisters?

EDIT: And this was previously mentioned. Must've missed it.

Well, now that that’s over with…wait, no, we have the fat jokes. Um, the “all the fat goes to my boobs” line, the, um, “mine are more perky” line…ok, this can be summed up as the “I’m sexier than you” fight. I have paused halfway through the fight, and will note anything particularly outrageous (relative to this show.)

…um, ok, “It doesn’t take much to satisfy you,” said by Stocking. I believe that she just called her sister a whore…uh, Panty just called the dude’s dick “barfed-up shit”…

This is pretty ridiculous, by this show’s standards.

Also, while the video’s still paused: this means that all the yuri of Panty and Stocking is now canonically incestuous yuri. Is this good? Is this bad? That shouldn’t be a question, it’s obviously bad.

Well, it looks like the fight, or at least, the verbal part of it, is over. They’ve taken to trying to kill each other with their Holy Weapons of Undergarment, hereafter referred to as HWUs, because saying “Panty’s panties” is just tedious.

And then Garterbelt enters. And he’s with Nerd Guy (whose name is apparently Brief, but I’m calling him Nerd Guy. I could also call Panty “Whore” and Stocking “Goth,” but that would be going too far.)

Um, I think Nerd Guy just called Garterbelt “you guys’ dad.” That’s not true, right?

Well, with his declaration of “I’m single,” it seems that it isn’t true. I hope.

The hint for this episode is “rope.”

I am going to bet that there will be at least one bondage joke.

Well, we have the mandatory “siblings talking in unison” scene (I cannot get over the fact that they are siblings. They look nothing alike.)

Ok, they break up. This is going to be the Sibling Power episode, isn’t it? I’m sorry, but I’d rather take the Ghost.

Uh, Brief gets run over by Stocking. Stocking is still complaining about the eaten pudding. Chuck…wow, I just realized that, like a Pokemon, all he can say is “Chuck.” How did I not notice that?

Well, Stocking has apparently arrived and her destination.

It is totally a redlight district.

She calls Garterbelt, asking for the ID of the Ghost. However, Panty steals the phone, saying that she’s willing to help, but Stocking takes the phone and feeds it to Chuck, forcing Panty to listen to the sound of Chuck shitting. Seriously, what’s with the toilet humor?

Back to Stocking…Little Red Riding Hood, with a rope (I see how this is going to turn out) attached to her come running towards Stocking, yelling for help. Stocking remembers that all the Ghost attacks involved girls, and concludes that the Ghost must only attack girls.

Well, Stocking takes the bait, follows the little girl, and gets her ass captured. And whaddaya know! There are two Ghosts working together (or at least the Ghost is two separate entities.) I wonder how this episode could turn out! Maybe they will need two people, working together, to defeat both of them!

Look, as long as there isn’t any mention of the words “dance,” “want,” or “win,” I’m fine.

Ok, the Ghost is actually two separate entities. Well, the two Ghosts rope people in two steal money. And they’re roped together! Panty figures out that that’s what the hint “rope” meant! The Ghosts begin strangling Stocking with their rope.

I am forced to conclude that, at birth, Panty and Stocking smashed their heads together.

AND THERE’S OUR BONDAGE JOKE. THERE WE GO! “It isn’t that bad,” Stocking says. “I could get used to this.” FOR FUCK’S SAKE, GUYS, DON’T MAKE IT SUCH THAT I CAN PREDICT WHICH ENTIRELY TASTELESS JOKES YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE JUST FROM ONE FUCKING WORD!

The Ghosts comment on the Too Kinky to Torture nature of their victim.

And we get a Big Damn Heroes from Panty, who is riding Nerd Guy, who is riding a Scooter. She takes a couple shots, but they’re ineffective.

Look, the rest of the arc is going to be a fight scene, followed by a closing scene that will most likely involve Panty having sex with something, as well as something to do with Stocking and sugar. Resuming the video, and…

Yes, it’s a fight scene…wait but it’s between panty and Stocking. Ok, now it’s the real fight scene. Wait, no, they’re still fighting each other. Ok, correction: they will fight each other, then the ghost, then they will have sex.

Wait, now they’re fighting the Ghost. And the Ghost dies.

Holy shit, this closing scene might not actually involve sex! There’s dramatic-ish music…could we ask from some actual characterization? Some drama? Actual intelligence involved in this scene?

Oh, wait, it’s Panty giving Stocking some pudding. Well, at least there’s some reconciliation aspect…

And holy shit, the ending did NOT, I say again, did NOT involve sex! Props to this arc for not leaving me wishing that I was 21 and could get hammered legally!

Next arc, “Pulp Addiction.”

HUMOR, MOTHERFUCKER! DO YOU WRITE IT?!

Opening narration is…

Portsharch’s journal. July 2nd. 0600 hours.

God damn, you guys. God damn.

Well, at least it’s about a D-Day-esque war, and not about whores and criminals and saying “no.”

Ok. I just realized that this scene is taking place inside semen. I am about to rewatch this scene, and then I will probably lose it. The next few paragraphs of this liveblog are an account of the undertaking of aforementioned procedure.

Now, it was the general’s lines that tipped me off, but there are hints in the journal narration. “0600 hours,” “even if they’re all protein”…

And the dude’s writing is made entirely of little sperms.

“Some of our men lost control of themselves, and flew off the handle too early.” Upon first hearing this sentence, I thought it was the writers just making an allusion to sex. But no! This is actually a scene taking place inside semen. “So, stand erect!” the general says.

“I can’t wait to die for my cunt-ry,” one soldier says. I do not know if it is the translator or the actual original Japanese that is responsible for this travesty.

Well, they’ve reached the beachhead. They…essentially just ripped of Saving Pirvate Ryan.

The dreaded General Scottie arrives. He drops tissues upon the soldiers.

IT IS ALMOST THREE MINUTES INTO THE GODDAMN ARC DO NOT TELL ME THAT THE WHOLE THING IS AN ANALOGY FOR FAPPING YOU BASTARDS.

It…ok, we have the opening animation again.

I do not believe that that scene had any relevance to the plot at all.

I am going to forget that that ever happened.

We cut to a scene of a milkman running over Chuck. I do not believe that that scene had any relevance either.

Garterbelt runs in, saying that “they’re all gone.” After Panty asks what, it is revealed that the tissues are gone, and as such, Garterbelt cannot release his load.

YOU’RE A PRIEST, DUDE. ACT LIKE ONE.

Um…but it might not actually be what I think it is. His…afro, for some reason, is swelling the fuck up, turning red.

…could it be that the semen scene actually had something to do with the plot? Awaiting further developments.

Uh, we have a close up of Panty’s spit, which splatters all over Garterbelt’s face. It looks just like semen.

I do not know what the fuck is happening.

Oh, nope! Nothing complicated. He just wants tissues so he can fap. “The mouth cannot compare! The way the tissue softly carreses the tip!” There’s no way that that’s subtext. That’s context.

Um, Garterbelt is talking about the lack of tissues being a national crisis. He needs his tissues, guys. This man needs to fap.

…

I cannot satisfactorily explain what just happened, or what my reaction to it is.

I believe that the man’s afro has just jazzed, though that may be incorrect.

It may be true that the man’s afro is also his penis, though that may also be incorrect.

I do know, however, that a bolt of semen has leapt into the sky.

Wait, there’s actually going to be a Ghost this episode? Well, it appears so. The next hint, “paper plant,” has fallen from the sky.

Panty and Stocking drive to the Paper Plant. All the guards are frozen by some white substance. I would like to think that it’s ice, but knowing this show, it’s probably jizz.

A bunch of…ghost things come out. Wait, the opening scene actually had relevance. As it turns out, sperm, once absorbed by tissues, become Ghosts! Ahahahaha! AHAHAHAHAHA! OH GOD MAKE IT END

The Ghosts fire up their penis-guns (the guns are actually penises. They’ve got a head and everything.)

Oh wait, they’re actually going to fight them. And you know what that means, kids! Stripper Transformation Sequence!

Look. Kubo. Tite Kubo, you there? I just want you to know.

You’ve been outclassed. Whoever writes this show is a bigger troll than you can even aspire to become.

They have a finishing move—final ejaculation. Um, but they never use it. They just get shot first.

Wait, we’re back in the semen-scene.

They are making a final attack on the hill, which is just a vagina. This show has desensitized me to its shit. The fact that they even show pubic hair just doesn’t register.

They have finally reached the Bush! But, sadly, they all get owned by a condom.

The end.

I believe that I may reasonably expect every single one of the next episodes to be more of the same.

edited 16th Oct '10 6:19:04 PM by Chubert

You've been broken, haven't you. You might want to watch Dead Leaves and see how it compares.

I just read this and what. WHAT. This is sad. Gainax? I am disappoint.

Well, I don't like, or at least, I'm Tsundere for the show, and it's reflected in my liveblog. See it for yourself before judging Gainax.

edited 16th Oct '10 5:44:54 PM by Chubert

It's better to actually watch the show before reading this. Personally I kinda like it, though mostly for the art style and the weirdness of it all than the humor.

…hoo boy.

Here goes Episode 4. Now, I’m going to start off optimistic. Going to start off believing that this episode won’t be mindless sex jokes. A new episode! A new liveblog!

The first arc is “The Diet Syndrome.” The background image is a naked women, when the vagina just cut off.

Optimism.

Opening animation…narration focuses on dieting. And the various means to do so. Um- and something about anorexia and death. I have no idea where that came from. Cut scene to…

Stocking, eating sweets. Ok, this is probably going to be Stocking getting fat, isn’t it? Chuck is the Butt-Monkey as usual.

Panty strolls in, singing her “who needs love when you can have hot, steamy sex” song. But this is nothing out of the ordinary, no? This is perfectly normal for this show!

Goody, it’s the daily argument. Uh, Panty warns Stocking that she’ll gain weight (didn’t we have this argument before?) Stocking replies that (ok, video paused, I’m fairly certain we’ve had this argument before-) it all goes to her breasts. Right? Right?

“I don’t gain weight, I can eat as much as I want.” Hey! I was wrong! See, that’s what I get for being pessimistic in a liveblog where I started out being optimistic.

Well, it’s a fairly standard Panty/Stocking argument so far….

Uh, we cut to a scene of Stocking browses through a sweets magazine. I didn’t know there was such thing. Next scene is Stocking before a mirror, squeaking her newly formed muffin top.

I totally did not see this coming.

She then proceeds to step on a scale, where her weight stands between two strange symbols. It is, apparently, bad.

I swear to god this show sends the worst messages to people. Gainax? What the fuck, guys?

Well, we have Stocking jogging, while the Rocky theme song with a slightly different chord progression plays. Uh, and a quick flash to Panty sleeping in bed. And another quick flash to Stocking (who has a hood over her head) break into her house (while the Mission Impossible theme, again, with a slightly different chord progression) plays. She steps on the scale. The scale now rests on a symbol (now recognized by me as a pig.) Stocking has not lost any weight.

Well, Panty comes in with a pile of snacks that she got from one of her “fans” (this person has fans? She does not have fans. She has the FBI on her fucking tail, those are her fans.) Because they look sugary, she gives them to Stocking.

Stocking refuses. Panty is beginning to suspect something: “what? You serious?” Well, she gives it to Chuck, while providing a detailed narration of what she’s doing (I believe that she’s doing it on purpose) . Stocking finally snaps, turning towards Chuck, while a sweet slowly falls into his mouth. While the Space Odyssey 2001 music plays (again, with a slightly different chord progression).

Well, Panty finally notices that Stocking’s on a diet. Stocking vehemently denies this…

Until Panty pulls up Stocking’s shirt to reveal this belt-thing that she had been using to augment her diet (this had been going on since the beginning of the “want sweets?” scene, I just didn’t mention it). There is a bit of an art shift as we cut to a scene of Panty lifting up Stocking’s shirt to reveal the belt, saying “Peekabo” each time she does. I admit, I laughed.

Well, uh, after that, Stocking pulls of a laugh to rival Laughzaku, twirls into this gated room, takes Chuck with her, and beats the shit out of him.

Well, after that scene, there’s another theme song (I do not recognize it, but I’m to assume that it’s ripped off.) Well, after that, we see Stocking’s training sequence. Uh- I’m fairly certain that Stocking is starving herself.

And now she looks like a fucking ghost. Like, anorexia and everything. Somehow, she’s gained weight, and now possesses a massive belly.

I don’t really know how it happened. I’m just slightly upset that these guys are using this for humor, seeing as I have friends who had anorexia before.

Well, Stocking screams, snaps, and then starts consuming sweets like crazy.

…wut. Um, at night, her body explodes. It fills up the entire house.

As panty laughs her ass off, Garterbelt shows up. Wait, this a Ghost episode? Thought it was just a gag…

Wait, nope, the rolls that Stocking was eating were actually Ghosts. Or, more specifically, the yeast in the rolls are Ghosts. Well, Stocking turns into a massive ball of Stocking.

Eh, we cut to a scene of our Ghost. She has very prominent nipples, but that’s not the point. The ghost apparently just wants everybody to be obese, so nobody will have to diet anymore…

Fight scene-possible sex gag/actual semblance of intelligence-end of arc. Ok, let’s go.

….the ghost just grew nipples. The nipples are shooting out cream. Panty cowers, but Stocking devours all the cream.

The Transformation Sequence begins, except with Balloon Stocking doing it as well. At least they subvert Beauty Is Never Tarnished.

Stocking’s sword is completely ineffective, because they “stretched out.” Woop de do.

Uh, the Ghost rampages through the city.

Panty blows the ghost up. Seriously, why didn’t Stocking get to do anything? Ah well.

End scene is Stocking eating sweets again. At the very least, they have a “I’m not gonna sweat an extra kilo or two” line, so it’s not entirely tasteless. They instead have a “self-control is bad for the soul” message.

Next arc is “High School Nudical.” Yay. I’m beginning to feel that every single arc title is a rip-off, I just didn’t catch some of them.

Didn’t we already have the high school episode?

Opening sequence is of Panty and Stocking tuning up their HW Us. Or at least, Stocking is, Panty’s doing nothing. Stocking explains that Garterbelt won’t be happy if they don’t tune their weapons up. Panty, as usual, doesn’t give a shit, and goes to the city for “Party and Hunting.”

Panty shows Stocking an image of an ad for…”Lingerie Run,” with a disturbing looking old man. Well, they’re going back to Daten City High, which means that we’re seeing Geek Guy again. Apparently, Lingerie Run is a place where everybody strips down to their underwear and starts dancing.

FUCK OPTIMISM WHY IS THIS HAPPENING GOOD GOD MAKE IT END MAKE IT ENDDDDDDDDDD

Yay, we get to see Panty and Stocking run around in their underwear.

The crowd hails Panty and Stocking. The two run through the crowd, fondling and groping everybody in their path. The two crowds faint.

Wow what the fuck why why why why…..

If I WANTED Hentai, I would’ve WATCHED Hentai. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!

Well, they find Geek Guy, and there’s accusations made of Geek Boy still having his foreskin attached.

“Master G,” host of the event, shows up. It is obviously Garterbelt. He welcomes everybody to the Lingerie Run.

Explaining the history of the event, Garterbelt checks out the bulges of all the peoples’ underwear. Only the guys, actually.

Wait. No. I was wrong. Lingerie Run is when they all run through the streets half naked.

Panty checks out guys’ junks, Stocking is carried on a chariot-thing. (I know there’s a name for that, just forgot what it is). Brief fails to check out Panty. Well, as the two angels run along, they notice that everybody has become naked. Garterbelt phones in, saying that it must be the work of a Ghost. The angels draw their HW Us. The Ghost appears, and this guy looks like a total creeper. Panty tries shooting him, her gun fails. Stocking tries cutting him, her sword shatters. Yay….

Well, the Ghost surrounds Panty and eats her HWU, as well as Stocking’s.

Apparently Stocking has Anime Anatomy, as when she flashes her naked bottom, we see nothing.

Panty and Stocking drive along, and Stocking brings up the question that they don’t have HW Us.

Panty tries taking underwear from the guys lining the side of the road, but all the guns are fucking useless.

Owait, lemme guess, they’re gonna use Geek Boy’s. The Ghost refuses to touch Geek Boy, because his underwear’s so dirty. Panty steals Geek Boy’s underwear, it turns into a shotgun, the Ghost is blown away.

….wait, the gun’s a representative of the person’s dick? …jesus fucking Christ.

Shredded underwear rains from the sky.

Garterbelt gives a speech about underwear. The episode should end soon. Really, it should. Really, please, end soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon. End soon.

Wait, it’s not over? Well, it turns out that Garterbelt was arrested. End.

Wait, was Panty just about to give chocolate to her dog?

Face Palm.

^Keep in mind that this is the same dog who ate a pile of VHS tapes with no obvious negative effects a few episodes ago. I'd say it can handle chocolate.

edited 12th Feb '13 8:36:04 AM by CompassionateSadist