ITT: We Are All Pirates' Revenge

Sounds like a pixie-tale to me.

Duane exits the shot glass, going to further inspect the pirate crew with the chest.

(The coral snake pirate looks fascinated.)

That sounds soooo cool! (He says.) Do you guys know which islands the other pieces are on? Do you have a map?

Jane is quick to respond. "'Course we don't. Not like he left clues or anything. We're shooting in the dark."

"What kind of captain leads his crew on such a ridiculous search? He reminds me of... my old captain." Melvin shudders.

Reposting the Discord invite link because I got bottompaged and it might be easy to miss. Okay, I'll stop now. :P

Edited by DrNoPuma on Dec 28th 2018 at 1:55:33 PM

By now the small group of pirates has finished cleaning off the exterior of the chest, and the rest of it is now visible.

The chest is on a small set of wheels, and is made of mahogany wood with metal linings. It is locked with a lock that's shaped like a skull.

The pirate captain undoes the chains that are wrapped around the chest and finds that they are attached to the chest itself, the cannonball chain is attached to the right side of the chest and the other chain being attached to the left side of the chest. He sees that the left chain has a skeleton key on the end of it and inserts it into the lock, unlocking it.

The treasure chest opens, the lock now stuck on the skeleton key as the pirate captain tosses the key aside. Inside the chest one can see gold artifacts, coins, and jewelry from various cultures among the treasure, and one of which was a sword with a golden handle.

As the pirate captain gleefully reaches for the treasure, he gets punched in the face from the left. His eyes dart to see who his attacker was and notices that the lock and key has turned into a fist. Before he could respond the cannonball chains whips itself at his stomach, knocking the wind out of him and causing him to fall over backwards. Then the cannonball chain wraps itself around one of his legs and pulls him to the chest face-to-face, as the chest has hidden circular panels on the edges of both the top and bottom halves of the lid area slide back and sharp metal teeth pop out of the holes as the wood on top of the chest shifts to form mischievous black eyes with red irises. The chest's hand was now gripping the sword that was in it, holding it inches away from the captain's throat as the chest speaks.

Klamptrap:   YARR! Don't you dare try to steal the treasure of me, the greatest treasure chest that's ever lived, Klamptrap! Now, BEGONE!   

The pirate captain quickly scrambles to his feet and he and his crew then run out of the place in fear of the chest.

Well, woudja look at that.

Jane looks at Klamptrap with a mild amount of interest. "Oh, huh. Hey."

(The pirate snake's jaw drops upon seeing the living treasure chest in front of him.)

No...way! (He says, half-slithering, half-hopping up to Klamptrap and looking the chest over.) Wow, didja guys ever think that living breathing treasure chests were a thing??

"Huh..." says Melvin.

"There sure are a lot of surreal things in this world," he mutters to no one in particular. "What if... what if this Max Funnybones guy isn't so crazy after all? What if there really is a Legendary Egg?"

“Can I come along? I’m an expert at finding treasure on islands.”

"Maybe. He's never been wrong on hunches like this. But at the same time, you know. There's no way it's real." Jane looks over to Guybrush, sighing.

"Listen, I shoulda been more blunt. We ain't hiring. If you wanna do this, you'll have to make your own group or something."

Melvin has been munching on a small loaf of bread. When Jane says this, his eyes grow wide, and then he quickly finishes the bread.

"That's it! We could all go on a quest for the Egg ourselves! The Egg is supposed to be able to grant wishes to everyone in the crew who finds it. You all have something you really want, don'tcha? I know I do..." he says, gently touching his mask.

"Anyway... what do you all say?"

The boy listens to all the talk about an egg. It sounds kinda interesting, but not what he’s here for. He approaches the bartender and gulps. “Uh… excuse me?”

(And almost immediately the pirate snake is back over to the others.)

I'll join! I'll join! How soon can we get going?

“But I have grog!”

"Whit is it, lad?" the bartender says to the boy.

"You can finish your grog," says Melvin, "But once we start travelling, just think of all the places we'll go! We can get grog and better yet, food, from all over the world!"

There's a guy in the corner who looks supremely disinterested in the situation, almost exaggeratedly so. He seems like he's specifically trying to be disinterested, so he's pulling out a facade.

Outside the pub, a guy who clearly doesn't belong in this time period is arguing with a lady who clearly does and a giant purple dragon... sorta.

"I'm a pirate!"

"A space pirate."

"Same difference."

"Why did they have me bring you along? You are so out of place here..."

"Let's just start the mission. The longer we spend here, the longer we derail the plot."

"Yeah."

"Of course."

“Have you seen a girl around here? She, um… She looks like me…” The boy himself has rather messy, dark brown hair and brown eyes. That’s all there really is of note. “But she’s taller, has longer hair and stuff.” As he elaborates, his hands do a variety of gestures go along with his description.

"I'm afraid not," the bartender says. "It looks like those other gents are gonna go down t' the harbor. You could follow 'em there, even if just to ask other people at the harbor if they know the girl."

"..." Jane looks to the others. They're going on the same mission as her, but these people seem way more interesting than the random mooks of her current gang. Maybe she won't be an errand girl either.

"Hold on for a sec." Jane gets up from the table and walks out the door.

"HEY MAX!!" She shouts.

"WHAT?!" A shrill voice replies.

"I'MMA SEPERATE FOR A BIT, DO MY OWN THING. YOU MIND?"

"NOT REALLY, NO."

Jane walks back in, looking to the others. "Alright, ready whenever you are."

He frowns. He can’t say he’s surprised that she isn’t here right now. “Okay, thank you.” He may as well follow all these people to the harbor.

"I'll join, if it gets me out of here... I'm not really good at anything, though..."

Well, look at that, Mel! Already the captain of your own crew! And you said you “weren’t looking for a piratey job”! Bah!

Duane stands on his hind legs. I’ll come with you guys! I’m sure I could thinka something to wish for...

Man, I need to think of something to wish for... (The coral snake says, scratching his head with his tail.) ...Oh, my name's Lyle, by the way.

"Aw, cousin," Melvin scoops Duane up and hugs him before setting him down. "I came here hoping to get a job as a craftsman so I wouldn't have to go sailing again. But despite all the hardships I went through when I worked on a pirate crew, something is calling me back to the sea. If Max Funnybones is so excited to find the Egg, maybe I should be too!"

He does give Jane a strange look, though. "You're bailing on your captain just like that? Why?"