Things You are No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG

1. Ahem.

"And as long as a sack of shit is not a good thing to be, chivalry will never die."

^Your link led to a blackhole in the space time continuum and nearly killed me too.

Apocalypse: Dirge Of Swans.

For all of you in this thread having trouble with your list formatting, you can use the # instead of * in order to make a numbered list. It's rarely used, so few people know about it.

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

1. Pink dragons can not be bribed with MLP figures.
2. I am not allowed to go Gelatinous Cube in barfights.
3. The GM doesn't care if it's a crossover, I'm not allowed to get the Robot Masters to fight The Terminator.
4. I am not allowed to force our ranger to have a child with a dragon so it will let us go free.

4a Especially if I also have to force the dragon into it. -5 No re-creating Dai-Gurren scenes with my wizard's animated ship. -5a Unless I have an excuse. -5b Not allowed to name my character "Kameron Edmond Naugh" just to have an excuse. -5c Or "Simon Garlock."

edited 18th Apr '11 3:35:44 PM by Krautman

...and that's terrible.

You know, the more I read lists like these, the more I want to perform almost every single action on them.

Even the stupid/wussy ones.

So, then just how are you allowed to mount a dragon?

That’s the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw

Well, thats how little dragonborn are- well, BORN.

• I am not to simply "Run Away!" from the final boss.
  • Even if he gives me the option to do so.
• I am not to hold thieving competetions with the party thief.
  • Or the Thieves Guild. I can't bet on said competitions either. I certainly can't rig them.

You cannot bet on the thieves guild contests and cannot rig them when you do? Your GM sounds narrowminded, that is an awesome idea.

1. I am not allowed to befriend the Tarrasque.
2. Or a Great Old One.
3. I am not to outwit the God of Trickery.
4. I am not allowed to cheat when I play cards with the God of Trickery.
5. I am not allowed to cheat clerics of the God of Trickery out of their life savings.
6. I am not allowed to use my Great Old Friend as a means of transport. Even if he agrees to it if I housesit for him.
7. I am not allowed to use my knowledge of non-Euclidean geometry to design GOF's house with six floors on the same level.
8. I am not allowed to use his pool. Seriously, he said it was filthy and I shouldn't.

...and that's terrible.

Talking Is a Free Action unless I intend to chant the names of every Great Old One and demon lord I can think of in the hope of having Orcus or Hastur turn up to kill my enemies.

3. "Pazuzu" and "Beetlejuice" are not interchangable.

"You have more than enough potential. So tell me what is the one wish that would make your soul gem shine." -Mitt Romney, probably

1. Even if we're playing a high-level campaign, my bard cannot play the vorpal bagpipes.
2. A twentieth-level campaign means my character should have twenty adventurer levels, not nineteen levels-worth of templates.
3. Nor nineteen levels worth of XP in scribed scrolls.
4. No matter how many third-level spell slots my sorcerer has, we will not mark our way back to the nomad encampment with a trail of glass.

Add me on Skype: Al Cook (darnpenguin)

"You cannot bet on the thieves guild contests and cannot rig them when you do? Your GM sounds narrowminded, that is an awesome idea."

I thought so too. Apparantly, however, I'm "supposed" to be a hero. Even after I said I was doing so to sow dissent and get them all arrested he still didn't believe me. This was after I broke an entire campain by taking over the mafia to overthrowing the lawful evil empire instead of doing so by gathing a sword of legend and uniting the surrounding contries. Maybe that had something to do with it?

@Re: Potion of Glibness: I must do that. I MUST.

And I'll probably be banned from playing Street Performers ever again, once mine hits level five. Take 20 on bluff checks~

Why not? That sounds like a challenge any self-respecting cleric of trickery should not only accept but embrace with fervor.

I'm not terribly conversant with D&D 3.5, so I don't get this one at all.

That’s the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw

Let's just say the iconic 3rd level spell is the trusty Fireball...

So, you'd be leaving behind a trail of broken windows? Still don't entirely get that one.

When sand is heated sufficiently, it becomes glass.

...and that's terrible.

I like the trail of broken windows better.

Well, Fireball DOES have a radius of 20 feet.

...and that's terrible.

Sand requires heat and pressure to become glass. Though I guess the explosive force of the fireball would fulfill that requirement.

edited 25th Apr '11 9:13:50 AM by Bindlestick

"You have more than enough potential. So tell me what is the one wish that would make your soul gem shine." -Mitt Romney, probably

Let's see...

1. Not allowed to make a character with an effective Valor of 9, even if the Scroll of Heroes makes it possible.
2. ...or any Virtue higher than 5 for that matter.
3. The Twilight Caste Mark is not a smiley face.
4. Cannot invent custom charms to turn people's Caste Marks into smiley faces.

edited 25th Apr '11 9:57:07 AM by Xeniph

My title is no longer sticking out of its box, but I couldn't think of anything better to put here.

Lightning strikes on sand can cause the formation of a type of glass called Fulgurite.

Loophole: You don't need custom Charms to do it. Play an Infernal. Learn The Tempest of Inward Focus.

I myself am quite tempted to make my Defiler's new Caste Mark, if he gets round to taking that, a circle with a dot in the middle and one on the circle at the top...