Get a Room!

Yeah, nobody wants to see THAT!

"Hey, is it still funny to yell "get a room"? I don't care, I'm going for it. [yells]
Get a room!"

— J.D., Scrubs

Stock Response to two characters acting in an unusually lovey-dovey way, or flirting (but generally what each character thinks of as covertly, since they often Cannot Spit It Out), or fighting. Occasionally used sincerely in the event of Coitus Uninterruptus, and in the other direction, also used on non-sexual friends (often but not always Heterosexual Life-Partners) by the resident Deadpan Snarker. Mood Dissonance, both to "get back to the comedy already!" in the first two versions and to keep viewers from becoming more titillated than they should be for the time slot.

A Sister Trope to Why Don't You Marry It?. In the rare semi-serious instances, it may forestall a couple from Making Love in All the Wrong Places and/or being Overcome with Desire. A much less aggressive counterpart is Leave the Two Lovebirds Alone.

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Examples:

Advertising

• A Halloween commercial for K-Mart (started airing in 2009) shows a costume party. A couple dressed as vampires make romantic comments to each other. Another partygoer dressed as a pirate yells "Arr! Get a tomb!" Although, he might have a point. There are children at this party.

Anime & Manga

• In Ah... and Mm... Are All She Says, this runs through the mind of one of the people watching Tanaka playfully run from Toda, who's trying to get her to delete a photo of her smiling.
• When Boarding School Juliet's Secret Relationship is finally outed, the students do not hide their discomfort when Romio and Juliet are together in public. It's not that they were up to anything sickeningly sweet (although Romio certainly wanted to), but rather they were trying to inspire their previously-warring houses to be more friendly to each other.
• In Sword Art Online, this is the standard reaction of Lisbeth when Kirito and Asuna act too lovey-dovey.

Comic Books

• Plastic Man says this to Wonder Woman and Superman while they are Slap Slap Kissing in Frank Miller's All Star Batman. Clearly, Wonder Woman just attracts this trope in general. It happens with Batman as well, except it's a villain Batman caught who has the nerve to point this out.◊
• When both Wally West (when he was still going by Kid Flash) and nemesis Captain Cold were taken to a hospital by The Flash, they were put into two adjacent rooms. Wally flirts with the nurse that's tending to him, and Snart, who can see them from across the hallway, snaps at them with this reaction.
• Superman also gets this with Lois after a "Shut Up" Kiss from the latter in Superman v2 #178.
• A smaller example in Uncanny X-Men (2016). Sabretooth and Monet are snarking at one another during a mission. Nearby Psylocke is fighting enemies and surprised they are still bickering. She tells them to just get a room, going on to note that all of them weren't needed for the mission if they have the time to be fighting -or rather flirting, during the battle.◊

Fan Works

• Back To Us has Marinette say this to Alya and Nino when they start kissing in a gelato shop. Alya's response: "This is a room. You and a bunch of other people just happen to be in it."
• In Broomsheds, Lifts and Loos Hannah says it to Harry and Ginny when they get the idea of having a quickie in the Leaky Cauldron bathroom - for the second time.
• In the Facing the Future Series story "Two for One", in response to Danny and Sam's Make-Out Kids routine, Valerie cries out "Will you two get a broom closet, already?!", referencing how Danny and Sam's favorite make out hideaways are closets and lockers.
• In Harry Potter, Harry Snape or Harry Riddle? Harry says it when Snape and Voldemort kiss in front of him.
• In Hot Shower Blaise says it when Draco flirts with Ginny.
• I Am NOT Going Through Puberty Again!:
  • When Sasuke and Sakura are flirting with each other while at the tower in the center of the Forest of Death, Kankuro tells them while groaning to get a room.
  • Mitsuki says this to Boruto and Sarada when the latter two are bickering, who then tell him in unison to stay out of this.
• In Infinity Train: Seeker of Crocus: Jin Kisaragi shouts for Paul London (on the Infinity Train) and Specter (currently in a conference with London) in Den City. to "Just kiss already!" as the two of them act more like lovers than two friends reuniting after a long period of time.
• Loving Good:
  Fred: Oh get a room.
  Harry: I have a room, you get a wife.
• Naru-Hina Chronicles:
  • Upon seeing Ichiro and Takara kissing each other, Sai tells them to get a room so they can have sex and not do it on the street. Embarrassed by what he just said, Sakura tells him he should have just said "Get a room." and not the rest of his sentence.
  • Naruto says this to Sasuke and Sakura while the latter two are making out:
    Sakura: N-Naruto?! W-We don't need a room. We were just kissing!
  • Naruto does this to Sasuke and Sakura again when the latter two are about to kiss while travelling to some place for a mission.
• In Remus Severus Snape Remus and Snape's adopted son says it when he sees them kissing.
• In Silent Compassion Narcissa says it to Lucius and Severus after they flirt in front of Draco and Hadrian.
• Brainy and Brainette get this from the grown-up Smurflings when they see the two getting romantic with each other in Raven Child's The Smurfette Village series.
• In this Touken Ranbu doujin, when Ishikirimaru and Nikkari start getting lovey-dovey in the presence of Mikazuki and Juzumaru:
  Mikazuki: If you're going to continue, can you please not do it even on the engawa?
• True Potential:
  • At the end of the Kiri Civil War arc, Naruto wakes up from a coma after three days. When he's reunited with Hinata (who became his girlfriend by that point), she hugs him tightly and expresses some relief over him being safe and sound. It is then followed by this exchange:
    Hinata: But whatever; you're good now! Now-
    Anko: -you two can get a room?
  • Following a mission in Suna, Naruto is reunited with Hinata, where they end up hugging and kissing each other. Hanabi tells them to get a room, making the two lovebirds blush.
• In Who Knew Tim says it when Snape pulls Harry closer to him.

Films — Animation

• In the Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters, Shake yells this at Oglethorpe and the Ghost of Christmas Past from the Future when the two are making out. Shake then laughs at his own wit, and tries to draw everyone's attention to it.
• In Brother Bear, Tug jokingly yells "Get a cave!" (since they're unusually social Ice Age bears) to a pair of lovebird bears.
• In Romeo & Juliet: Sealed with a Kiss, Romeo and Juliet start smooching when they see each other again. Because they do it in front of Friar Lawrence, the otter's reply is a very deadpan "You two can't wait until after the wedding?" And then there's Mercutio's reply near the end of the film, "Come on! Will youse two get a cave!"

Films — Live-Action

• In (500) Days of Summer, Tom in an alcohol/depression fueled depression yells this to a couple holding hands on the street.
• Big Ass Spider!: This is Jose's cheerful comment to Alex and Brant at the end of the film.
• In Galaxy Quest, Guy says this to Laliari and Fred Kwan who start making out in the transporter room. They pay no attention. It quickly turns Squicky for Guy.
• In Iron Man 2, Rhodey tells Tony and Pepper (currently making out on the top of a building, or the open top floor of a damaged building) to "get a roof". When Tony complains that it's funny he's saying that, the buddy in question responds that "I was here first!"
• In Jumanji: The Next Level, Martha and Spencer climb up the hill of Jurgen's fortress to rescue Spencer's grandfather, Eddie. They eventually make it to the dungeon, beat up a guard and start making out passionately only to be interrupted by Eddie watching them from his cell.
  Eddie: Alright, alright! Get a room!
• In Meet Wally Sparks when Wally passes by a couple slow-dancing, he tells them to get a room. When a moment later he passed by a larger couple also slow-dancing, he tells them to get a warehouse.
• In The Mummy Returns, Alex says this to Rick and Evy.
• Inverted in Planet Terror. Two of the go-go dancers are kissing each other in the dressing room. When the owner of the go-go bar sees this, he doesn't tell them to get a room but to get out on stage where the paying customers can see them make out.
• Said as "get a shroom" by Grouchy when he sees the Winslows getting so close with each other in The Smurfs 2.
• In Step Brothers, Dale says this to his father when the latter was expressing his joy and appreciation for his new bride at his wedding.

Literature

• Characters in the Mercy Thompson series tend to say this when seeing Mercy and Adam openly flirting.
  • When Ben says this, Adam tells him to stuff it.
  • Asil asks if the couple always bond over Bible quotes. Tad explains, "They can flirt with the periodic table or a restaurant menu. We've learned to live with it. Get a room you guys."

Live-Action TV

• 30 Rock: Mike D. and Ad-Rock shout this phrase at Jack Donaghy and his sick father, Milton, when they catch them hugging.
• One of the earliest occurrences of this joke happens in, of all shows, The Andy Griffith Show. In the 1963 episode "Up in Barney's Room," after Barney has been evicted from his boarding house, Andy catches Barney and Thelma Lou making out in the courthouse after hours. On his way out the door, Andy tells Barney, "You need to get yourself a room!"
• Angel: In the "Life of the Party", Lorne tells this to Angel and Eve during a Halloween party. Unfortunately, at the time, people obeyed everything he said so... He also tells Wes and Fred, when they're in the sweet-new-couple phase, to "get a balcony."
• Buffy the Vampire Slayer:
  • In "The Replacement", the Scoobies are checking out an apartment Xander is thinking of buying. When Xander opens a door and finds Buffy making out with Riley, he tells them to go find a bedroom. The couple look around pointedly — they're in one.
  • Lampshaded in "Once More With Feeling" when Xander notes the get-a-roominess of Willow and Tara, who supposedly rushed off to get a book for Giles. The Serenade Your Lover song that follows does in fact end up in the bedroom with strongly implied sex.
  • Averted when Willow and Tara get back together after their break-up in "Seeing Red". Dawn is so happy that her two mommies have gotten back together that she eagerly clears out of the house to give them some boinking privacy.
• On The Drew Carey Show Drew kisses his girlfriend where his neighbours can see:
  Neighbour: Get a room!
  Drew: Get a girl!
• Mal does this in Firefly when he catches Kaylee, who he ends up hiring, making out with his mechanic at the time Bester. He asks Bester if something is wrong with his bunk.
• The Fixer: Mercer sleeps with Rose, a woman he meets in an airport bar, only to find she's a Honey Trap for his new employer. He's not happy and the two engage in Snark-to-Snark Combat the next time they meet, until Callum lampshades the Belligerent Sexual Tension.
  Callum: I'd advise you two to get a room, but it seems you already have!
• Friends:
  • The end credits to "TOW Chandler in a Box" sees the gang watching from Monica's balcony as Chandler chases after Kathy so he can stop her going out of town. Once he catches up to her Phoebe tells them to get a room, although she says it quietly enough that only the others on the balcony can hear her.
  • During the Vegas two-parter Phoebe reacts this way when Chandler and Monica start kissing after making up from a fight.
    Phoebe: Get a room.
    Monica: We have one.
    Phoebe: I know. Use it.
  • There is a scene where the dialogue between Ross and his sister Monica is so loving that Phoebe teases by suggesting to them go to a hotel room.
  • When Monica starts gushing over the slice of chocolate cake she's eating Rachel suggests she and the cake should get a room.
    Monica: I would get a room with this cake. I think I could show this cake a good time!
• On Grounded for Life, was once followed by a phrase along the lines of "No! No, don't get a room!" when used by the parent of one of the Make-Out Kids in question.
• This is a Running Gag in How I Met Your Mother where Marshall and Lily are saying dirty things to each other for foreplay except Ted happened to be in the room.
  Ted: [weakly] Please don't.
  Marshall & Lily: Sorry, Ted.
• Nikita: Said by Birkhoff to Michael and Nikita when Michael asks her if she is alright whilst being in the CIA HQ, to which she replies "Oh, babe, I will be as soon as you get me out of here."
• Scrubs:
  • J.D. said this to a particularly aggressive couple.
  • Turk said a variant on this to J.D. and Elliot in "My Bed Banter & Beyond":
    Turk: This is a hospital. People around here are already sick.
• In Smallville, "Rush", Pete says this to Chloe and Clark when they are making out at the back seat of his car.
• Stargate SG-1: Samantha Carter to Adria and Ba'al, after the two had been arguing for quite some time.
  Sam: Why don't the two of you just get a room?
• Star Trek: Strange New Worlds: In the pilot episode, after Spock accepts T'Pring's marriage proposal the two start going at it in the middle of a Vulcan restaurant, prompting the Vulcan waiter to ask them to go do that somewhere else.
• A common phrase on The Suite Life of Zack & Cody (and its sequel series). That it is inappropriate for Disney Channel, especially when the main characters are still twelve or so, is occasionally lampshaded.
• On Supernatural Dean says this, while rolling his eyes, about Meg and Sam when Meg is kissing Sam while they're tied up. Later a girl says this about Dean and Crowley when they start bantering following Crowley finding Dean having sex in his bed with another girl. Crowley replies "I had a room! Until you soiled it!"
• White Collar:
  Mozzie: Get a room!
  Sarah: We are in a room.
  Neal: My room.
  Mozzie: [Beat] ... That hurts.
• When Whose Line Is It Anyway? alumnus Jeff B. Davis was filling in as announcer on The Price Is Right, he ad-libbed one when a contestant was getting rather close to host Drew Carey.

Music

• In Brad Paisley and Carrie Underwood's "Remind Me", a song about Dead Sparks, Brad recalls in the first verse how early in their relationship that people would tell them to get a room.
• Pretty much everyone who encounters the couple in Mitch Benn's "Disgustingly in Love":
  Their lives are full of gloom,
  And they're shouting "Get a room",
  At us 'cos we're disgustingly in love.

Tabletop Games

• Shadowrun: Mika and Ma'fan are both physical adepts and professional thieves who are each other's primary competition. They have dynamically opposed philosophies and methods and are pretty much the embodiment of Belligerent Sexual Tension. Eventually during the Way of the Adept supplement, their bickering gets on Fastjack's nerves and he tells them to put a stop to it;
  Fastjack: Take it to private messages or just fuck each other and get it over with. I don't care which.

Theatre

• The Most Happy Fella has a non-verbal instance of this. A couple of unnamed minor characters are given a push when they start getting too amorous with each other. They then run off to the hayloft they had told each other about earlier for a proper Roll in the Hay.
• In Tsukiuta's Memorial Tour concert series, You Haduki said this to idol unit leaders Hajime Mutsuki and Shun Shimotsuki when their flirty banter went on too long during their introductions. During the later performances, comic relief members Koi Kisaragi and Kakeru Shiwasu started saying this to You himself, who does indeed have a habit of flirting with the audience a lot.

Video Games

• In Borderlands 2, just before the assault on Control Core Angel, Lilith tells Roland that he had better not die on her and that if he makes it back alive, she's tearing his clothes off of him.
  Mordecai: Ugh, Lilith! No one wants to hear that!
  Brick: Go on...
• In Disgaea 3, Marona says this to Almaz and Sapphire. Fenrich asks much the same of Adell and Rozalin in Disgaea 4
• In Dragon Age II: Mark of the Assassin, Aveline will have this reaction to Hawke kissing Tallis. Alternatively, Fenris will say this when Hawke and a romanced Anders start flirting during the escape sequence.
• Final Fantasy X-2: Wakka tells Tidus and Yuna to do this in the Good Ending sequence when they share a passionate hug after Tidus is resurrected by the fayth.
  Tidus: Who asked you to watch, Wakka?
• Fire Emblem: Awakening:
  • If Chrom is not married by Chapter 11, and the lucky bride ends up being Sumia, she frets over him before hugging him. An amused Flavia responds with:
    Flavia: Hoo! Give these two some room!
  • In the supports between Nah and Morgan, it is revealed that Naga following Manaketes (possibly Divine Dragons?) can speak with their leader Naga mentally. After their confession of love, the two share this dialogue:
    Morgan: So, uh, did Naga have anything to say about this?
    Nah: Hold on, I'll ask.
    [...]
    Nah: ...She said to get a room.
• In the first game of the Galaxy Angel II trilogy, if Tact is married to Milfeulle, Ranpha says the trope word-for-word during their reunion scene in the final chapter.
• Knights of the Old Republic: Mission shouts this at Carth and the Light-Side Female Player Character.
  Mission: Hey! Sheesh... get a room, will ya?
  Zaalbar: That two spirits have found each other amidst such turmoil is a good omen, Mission. Does it not please you to see?
  Mission: Oh, sure. Even a good omen can get itself a room, though, don't ya think?
• Mass Effect:
  • If Tali was romanced in Mass Effect 2, she and male Shepard starts flirting in the third game under... questionable circumstances. Most squadmates express mild discomfort; Garrus yells at them to get it over with already.
    Garrus: I was there when you two had your thing, remember? Just... get a room and work it out.
  • Ashley and Kaidan will say something similar. Unlike Garrus, they were not there when Shepard and Tali had their thing.
    Kaidan: Uh, if you like, I can give you two some privacy.
    Ashley: Maybe we can talk about this when we're not on a damn geth dreadnaught.
  • In the Citadel DLC, if Garrus and female Shepard are in a committed relationship, they can start acting like Sickeningly Sweethearts. Zaeed Massani will suggest they get a room already.
    Garrus: Shepard, sweetie... love of my life, indulge your crazy boyfriend. I need to know you're safe.
    Shepard: If it'll make you feel better, honey.
    Zaeed: [listening in] Oh, go get a room. God knows this place has enough of them.
• In the Star Trek Online Foundry mission "Relics", the Player Character and the ship's counselor Dr. Shree have an Aliens Made Them Do It situation happen to them in a Noodle Incident. Your chief medical officer catches the two of you flirting^note or her flirting and you (pretending to be?) ignoring her, if you chose the Vulcan dialog options and has this to say:
  Chief medical officer: My patient isn't standing by for nobody. Quit with your hanky-panky. The whole crew knows about you two. Get a room.
• Hilariously in Tales of Arise after Alphen and Shionne are reunited the other party members comment on their Sickeningly Sweethearts behavior. Team Mom Kisara literally says this verbatim.

Visual Novels

• In Taketo's sequel in Class Trip Crush, Taketo and the protagonist are repeatedly told to either tone it down or get a room thanks to Taketo's complete lack of shyness where it comes to showering affection on the protagonist in public.

Webcomics

• In El Goonish Shive Sarah mentions this phrase as what part of her wants to do when she discusses her feelings for Elliot with Grace while they are all gender swapped. Grace assures her using it as an Unusual Euphemism.
• Girl Genius: Subverted. When Theo starts "Sparking", Sleipnir is eager to help. Everyone else gives them the room.
• In Kevin & Kell, Rudy says this to the eponymous couple, his stepfather and mother, when he sees them kissing at home. They're undeterred, since they apparently point out that this is their room.
• The Order of the Stick: After the entire party is turned into Super Smoke by the wind walk spell, instead of flying straight, Haley keeps doing a convoluted trajectory around her lover Elan (including shaping her mist trail like a Heart Symbol).
  Elan: Haha, Haley, what are you doing? You're gonna crash into me!
  Haley: I'm trying to mingle all our cloudstuff together
  Elan: Oh, good idea! Our gall bladders barely know each other!
  Belkar: Ugh, get a room.
• In one of the first post-Time Skip strips of Questionable Content, Dora says this about Penelope and her boyfriend Wil, who has just come back home after leaving to walk the earth for a few months, while the two are making out at Coffee Of Doom.
  Dora: Won't you two just go home and fuck already? You're distracting the customers.
  Faye: And making me nauseous.
  Penelope: Aw, gimme ten more minutes, I want to be paid for the whole hour.
  Wil: Darling, ten more minutes of this and all the blood will be drained from my head.
• 6 Gun Mage: Sierra eventually has enough of Kylie, Zeits and Gyweneth's Love Triangle-fueled awkwardness that she calls them all out:
  Sierra: For the love of the gods! Two of you just need to have sex already! I don't even care WHICH two, but this pussyfooting around the subject has got to stop!
• Ally's response to Alan and Marion's lovey-dovey behavior in the theater during their past in Sunstone. But given they're all into BDSM, this becomes, "Get a dungeon!"

Web Videos

• Analyst Bronies React: "The Crystaling" video has jokes that Starlight and Sunburst should stop trying awkward conversations, and just *bleep* already.
• Anyone But Me has Brett jokingly saying this to Vivian and Aster when he sees them kissing in the fourth episode.
• In the Bronies React video for the "Slice of Life" episode of My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, this is the general reaction to Lyra and Bon Bon talking about their "friendship".
  Nowacking: OH MY GOD, JUST BUCK ALREADY!
• Echo Chamber has one line from Zack regarding Tom and Dana.
  Zack: Just fuck already! Jesus!

Western Animation

• Adventure Time:
  • "Dream of Love": Finn convinces Mr. Pig to tell Tree Trunks that he loves her; the feeling is mutual. This backfires on Finn when Tree Trunks and Pig keep making out in public causing lots of anxiety and nausea for everyone else. Instead of telling them to get a room, Finn tells them to make out at home, but Tree Trunks insists that it would be indecent for them to live together unmarried and they're not ready to tie the knot.
  • In "Frost & Fire", Ice King yells this to Finn and Flame Princess while flying above them and watching Finn give Flame Princess a log as a gift.
    Ice King: Hey, you two should get a room! [beat] You and that log, not you and Finn, 'cause you're huggin' a log, you weirdo!
• In the Ben 10: Ultimate Alien episode "Perplexahedron", Gwen and Kevin kiss after the group's reunited inside the titular location, a giant collection of trap-laden rooms.
  Swampfire: Why don't you just get a room? This place is full of 'em!
• In the Bob's Burgers episode "An Indecent Thanksgiving Proposal", Louise uses a variant of this in regards to Bob's... peculiar turkey selection process.
  Louise: Geez, Dad, get an oven.
• Teenage son Kevin says it to his parents on F is for Family, but his dad has a lightning-quick comeback:
  Kevin: Geez, get a room!
  Frank: Aw, fuck you, get an apartment!
• In the Futurama episode "A Head in the Polls," Bender shouts this at a couple through a window as they scale the side of the Watergate hotel. The man shouts back, "We're in a room!" Bender shouts back, "Then lose some weight!"
• In an episode of The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy, Mandy tells Grim to "get a room" after he smothers his scythe — which he earlier lost — with kisses.
• In King of the Hill, an old man yells this to Hank and Peggy when they try to hold hands.
• In The Legend of Korra episode "In Harm's Way", when Zaheer and P'Li reunite after thirteen years apart, they almost immediately start kissing. Ghazan, who's driving a snowmobile to get them out of there, looks at them out of the corner of his eye and just mutters "Really? Right now?"
• The Simpsons:
  • After an episode in which Bart Simpson goes from embarrassed by his grandfather to having just rescued Nazi treasure and himself from the depths and from Mr. Burns, Bart gives his grandfather an unembarrassed hug. Then a pampered German aristocrat drives by and shouts "Hey, fun boys, get a room!"
  • In the episode "MoneyBART", during a fight between Bart and Lisa, this little conversation goes down:
    Nelson: Get a room, you two!
    Lisa: We're brother and sister!
    Milhouse: So are my parents, I think.
• At the end of the South Park episode "Super Best Friends", Stan and Kyle tell each other that they're each other's "super best friend", to which Cartman teases, "You wanna go get a room so you can make out for a while?" They then proceed to enjoy beating Cartman up together.
• Near the end of the Star vs. the Forces of Evil episode "Deep Dive", Star returns from her sleep-portaling and pulls Marco into a big, long hug, causing him to blush profusely... and Janna to disgustedly tell them to "Get a portal!"

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